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my husband
u know what i have been missing? paul doing things for me... we have been hanging out... but we always do that. i really miss him wanting to take me to the movies and actually doing it. when i went to his house... he would make me some of his special burgers [[those things are yummy... and he knows just how i love them]] i dont know... i guess he has been busy. thats ok though. i just wish that since now we can actually date... that he would take me some where.... on a date. he has been trying to get us to go to the movies for about 4 weeks now... but there is always something in the way... either he forgets his wallet in the car, or my dad wont let us go... or the movie is @ a time that we cant make... the odds have been against us.... well... for movies. a while ago i said that i dont want to have sex any more. cuz i think that we are wearing out gods welcome... and blessing... cuz we have done it with no protection... and yes i am on the pill.... but i know chicks that have been on the pill that still got a baby. and i dont wan that. i dont even think i want a baby to start with. they are so annoying... and i dont want to have to deal with that. ugh. paul does though... but not @ this point in our lives. so anyway... the odds arent against us for the whole sex thing... but for having any other kinda fun... doesnt seem like its really gunna happen. [[no... i dont use punctuation and i dont capitilize... ever.... i barley do spell check]] i know i am asking for a lot... but still i ask. i have been trying to learn japanese for him... so then we have something that he likes that we can do together... i have been learning from some of the kids @ skool and i have also been picking up a little online and from love hina [[i love those mangas.... they are so fun]]... i dont learn much from love hina. but thats ok. paul takes japanese classes on saturday... from idk when to 12. then he does nothing in the afternoon. i wish i could spend that time with him. but i am in his area when he is @ skool... and i dont think w8ing @ his house is an option. i just miss spending time with my babe. i love him.... and i think we are really ment to be. i mean... we have been together for a long time. and even when we werent going out he was a big part of my life. and he w8ed for me to get over wanting other boys, and see that he is the one for me. i really love him for that. and i thank him for that too. other people would have given up, but he saw the love. i have never been so happy in a relationship. we have had some bad times, but the good times we have..... diminish all the bad times. he gives me more happiness and pleasure than i give him credit for. he really does a lot for me. and it doesnt sound like it, but he puts me first... before anything he does. and i love that. he honestly cares about me. and i care for him. i want to be with him all the time... even when we are fighting. i cant w8 to live together. it will only be one more year until he moves out. and then one more year after that till i move out. im not going far, but i will be away from home. and my rents pretty much told me... start looking for a job, cuz ur guna be outa here soon. unlike my sister, i dont want to leave home. that is a lot to put on some one. and i think that once u leave home... u are gone. u shouldnt be coming to ur rents for money, so i have to balance skool and a job... but i know paul will help me out. hes a good man. im glad im with him. i love paul
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