Note to the 'X' No. 3
You have the ability to soften, melt, and make my heart glow. I don't think you've ever really fully realized the power you could have over me. I decided years ago to devote myself to you, and as you once said, 'I am a forever type of person.' I will always be fully and completely devoted to you. My beliefs go deeper than the name Moonbeam, I don't think you really know what it stands for to me. I don't think you really understand my beliefs, they aren't complicated. I've devoted myself to one or two others before until I was released, I wasn't devoted to them the way I am to you, it was different, sort of a friendship pact.
I did wear myself very thin at one point by telling so many people at once that I'd always be there if they needed me, but that was before you and none of them ever specifically came to me needing me again. And that isn't the same as pledging devotion. My advice usually was right, they got what they needed and left. I almost miss that and my gifts, I think it was partially my impurity that made my gift fade though I still posses it very little.
What had given me the gift had hinted that once it was over I'd be free and I thought it meant death. It wasn't very pleasant Seeing into their lives and how it all just fell onto my chest, it was horrible. I was gifted by whatever gifted me so that it was able to use me to help and do good, and I did do good. I saved and changed lives. Being so young and Seeing so much pain and hurt changed who I was. I think I was so perfect because of how distant from everything, I was free to hear and listen.
During this time was mostly when I was told I was so easy to talk to and very understanding. Now I am quite lost, I expected to die. My fate left me and nightly I pray for it to show me my new path. Maybe I can't listen like I use to; it was all so certain when I was young. I'm not the Moonbeam I once was, I don't think I will ever be. I'm just awkward and bizarre.
Wicked Alyce · Fri Mar 08, 2013 @ 09:01pm · 0 Comments |