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This week is the week of my conception.

Since I prefer to count my age from the time of my conception that means that this is essentially my "birth week" in a manner of speaking. it's more then that though. i'm currently leading myself through a series of meditations, meant to help me embrace those traits in myself which i try to hide for no other reason then that i do not precieve them as "normal" or typically present in others, and therefore wrote them off as odd, useless, or even negative.

for example, the way i fluctuate in energy and passion, and the fact that i tend to jump from project to project with only a broad focus connecting them all.

this, i thought, was a bad thing. i felt i had to be rigid and hard on myself, to force myself to choose one thing and immerse myself in it until the very end. i even punished myself for becoming exited about something new before the old was fully completed.

i guess i just never took the time to look at some of those odd traits of mine as assets or to really get to know them inside and out. i wrote them off before they ever had a chance to show their true colors, and i've suffered for it in small and large ways my whole life.

well no more! i'm going to try to be "reborn" in a manner of speaking. to embrace myself more fully and to let those traits come forth without trying to hid, suppress, or alter them. i'm just simply going to be me for the next several days, and see what happens.