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"But aren't you going to run and help her?" Alice asked...
"No use, no use!" said the King. "She runs so fearfully quick you might as well try to catch a Bandersnatch!"
<span id="test18870231">. . .</span><br/><div id="post18870231" style="display:none; margin-right:75px;">So you're in love with an Aries girl. I don't know whether to congratulate you or sympathize with you.
When Byron wrote that "Man's love is of man's life a thing apart; 'tis woman's whole existence," he forgot about the Aries woman. She may think love is her whole existence, but she's too vitally absorbed in the world around her, not to mention in herself, for it to be the beginning and end of her life. She can get along without a man easier than any female you'll ever meet.
That is why any man interested in keeping her attention will have to be damn well worth it. Not just any man will do for this woman.
Of course, getting along without a man is not the same thing as getting along without romance. She'll always need that hero of her dreams to yearn for in her heart. He may be long ago and faraway- or hiding just out of sight and touch, somewhere in tomorrow's mists, or just waiting to come and meet this walking tornado again- but she'll think about him in an April rain. He'll haunt her when the first snow falls, when she hears a certain song or sees lightning flash. However, while she's yearning, if the one she has sat her sights on is not around in actual physical presence, she won't fall apart and find another. She can wait, though she won't show outward signs of longing, simply because it would make her appear weak and weakness is one thing Aries female will not admit to. Welcome to the most complicated woman you will ever meet. She does not need to see the man she loves every day to spend the rest of her years in love; though her heart may break at the thought of losing someone, if it can be used against her in a court of law, she would not admit to crying over him. Aries must be strong. She hates the typical feminine role of sitting back and waiting; she would much rather be raising hell with him than sitting at the side-lines. Any man worth her time will understand that. Or will have to understand that. Anything he can do, she can do better- she thinks.
The Aries girl will open her own doors. She'll also put on her own coat, fight her own battles, pull out her own chair, hail her taxi and light her cigarette without any masculine help. Doing it herself is, to her, the fastest way to get it done. Naturally, this doesn't set too well on the vulnerable male ego. The Mars girl is determined to take the lead, to be the first to move to action, and that includes the action of making the first advance in romance. Aries females are the most likely of all the Sun signs to do the proposing, especially if the man is slow about naming the date. And that's about as early as you can safely show your feelings- when she proposes or tells you point-blank that you are hers. Before that you're taking a chance. Be very careful about moving in on an Aries girl. She wants to be the leader in the love affair. Better be sure you have her heart safely in your pocket before you try to grab her around the waist and kiss her goodnight. Otherwise, she may give you a sharp right hook to the jaw and run like a frightened deer.
Don't be misled. The reason for her running isn't maidenly modesty. She's not afraid of your passionate intentions. Those she can handle. Her flight is based on the fear of getting tangled up with a worshiping slave or a love-struck puppy dog, either one of whom would bore her to tears. Be casual, keep her guessing, and the chances are she'll chase you into a corner instead. A man who resists her impact always intrigues an Aries female. She can't understand why she isn't overwhelming him with her obvious charms. How is he not falling over every time she looks at him? Why, there's a challenge! Her Mars ego will leave no stone unturned to prove she's desirable, for this is a woman who gets what she wants.
Scarlett O'Hara is the very epitome of the Mars-ruled Aries female. Like Scarlett, the Aries girl will gather every available male for a hundred miles around to her feet without understanding why they are there (or even really caring; such a power-house of emotion has her moments where she does not see even the most obvious pursuit of her affection, for unless it is the one she wants, the one trying to woe her is invisible to her) while her willful heart yearns for the one man she wants more than any other. Like Scarlett, the Mars woman can quickly adapt for survival if necessary, without whimpering. Both the O'Hara and the Aries characters are tough enough to defy convention, face an advancing army, or even shoot a man through the head with icy calmness, if he threatens her loved ones.
Never was Scarlett more Mars-like than when she was starving, alone and friendless, and without waiting for a man to come to the rescue, she clenched her fist toward heaven and shouted, "I'll survive this...and when I do, I'll never be hungry again...If I have to lie, cheat, steal or kill- as God is my witness, I'll never be hungry again!" Much later, her emotions shattered, her beloved child dead and the one man she loved about to walk out of her life, this typical Aries woman was still able to say, "I'll think of some way to get him back. There's never been a man I couldn't get, once I set my mind on him...After all, tomorrow is another day."
Yes, Scarlett O'Hara creates a vivid image of the first Sun sign of the zodiac, with all the Mars strength and ability to bounce back after tragedy; able to play the female role to the hilt, with fluttering lashes and a well-timed tear, but just as able to take over a man's job when the men aren't around. A careful study of Scarlett's character can give you an excellent understanding of what you're in for with an Aries woman- and naturally, also the rewards you can look forward to after you've been brave enough to claim her. Her aggressive drive may be hard to take, but her shining optimism and faith in tomorrow can be mighty uplifting.
The Aries girl likes her flattery, if it has an honest base. Let her know you admire her, but don't be too flowery or sugary about it. Her loyalty in love is gigantic, as long as you keep the sentiment alive, for she is deeply sentimental. There's the typical Arien contradiction in her: she doesn't want to be obviously chased, yet she quickly loses interest if you're too detached. She doesn't want a completely domineering male, but neither will she warm up to a man who sits adoringly at her feet. She's more likely to kick him in the face and than laugh at the look of shock on his face. That's pretty harsh, but tame compared to what she can do when she's irked. She can not stand someone being clingy, but she wants him to be brave enough to not give up on fighting a battle to reach her...even if she is the very wall he must tear down to reach her. Before love can bring her happiness, the Aries woman must meet the eternal Mars challenge- her strong desire to control the lover, conflicting with her secret wish to be controlled by him, to find a man who would dare try. Unbelievably idealistic, sometimes she searches in vain for that brave knight in shining armor, who will sweep her off her feet, conquer the world, hand it to her gently and yet never sacrifice his manhood...Or her pride. Since he exists only in fairy tales and the myths of her own mind, the Aries woman often walks alone, without a star to guide her. Her days are bright and full of excitement, her nights are sometimes dark and full of longing. Yet, when her defeated dreams become smoldering ashes- just as you think the flame is dying, Aries leaps up to build another fire.
Nothing keeps Aries down for long.
She must be proud of you to love you. But don't be so important that you neglect to notice her talents and abilities. Though she'll demand a lot from you, she'll give double measure in return. The Aries girl can be generous to a fault with her time and sympathy, cheerfully sharing her possessions and money, but when it comes to love, she's down-right stingy. "What's hers is hers" in the romance department, and it will take very little to set off an explosion. If you do too well at not giving her what she needs from you- and this is a lady who will tell you- than she will remember why she was better off alone. If she's not first with you in every way, you'll soon wonder where all the intense passion and thrilling emotion went so fast. When the Aries woman has been really hurt, she turns from fire to ice. Her fire burns hot and can die just as quickly. Her ice can be eternal. Memorize that, if you care deeply about her- and it's doubtful that she'll stand for you caring about her any other way. Aries plays for keeps.
She puts the loved one on a pedestal, expecting him to live up to an impossible image of perfection, stubbornly refusing to look at his clay feet, until they become too muddy for even her to miss. Never criticize the lover, husband or children of an Aries woman unless you're wearing an asbestos suit. She's capable of being demanding, selfish, and making cutting remarks when you dampen her hopeful plans. Yet, she can also be gentle, devoted and cooperative when she's met halfway.
Since she prefers the company of men to women, and solicits admiration from every male she meets, be he nine or ninety, you'll have plenty of chances to feel the stabs of those little green monsters of jealousy. Forget it. As fiercely possessive as she is of you, she won't put up with your possessiveness of her for an instant. The Aries girl insists on complete freedom, before and after marriage. It's a test of who you are, in her eyes; it speaks of the man's confidence in himself to her...and with Aries, one must be confident. Her Mars ego is blunt enough to believe that she picked you- so damnit, why are you worried? You'll have to trust her wherever she goes and whatever she does, for she told you that you could trust her; her word is her honor and there's no reason to believe that she is cheating on you, for as harsh as it might sound Aries would tell you if she were, why she picked someone else (in what detail speaks highly of how angry she is), and to remind you to close the door on your way out. Remember, this woman is honest to the point of pain. She might try to not hurt your feelings but if pushed, she can shove back. Unless she's learned the hard way to keep her emotions under control even if it kills her (which it almost will), showing distrust in her will almost certainly ruin any she has in you. After all, if you can not trust her, it makes sense to her that you have done something to not be trusted. She is that honest, that she can not believe that someone else would lie to her, because where's the point? It is a two-way street to Aries. She has not done anything to be mistrusted so she believes you have not, either...unless you suddenly do not trust her. Aries shows her innocence in that regard. She's honest...so she thinks everyone else is. If you doubt her...might she have reasons to doubt you?
It's not as bad as it sounds, because she'll be faithful, once she's really yours. An Aries girl is seldom able to love two men at the same time, and since Aries is such a loner, unless it is love- a force bigger than herself, though good luck getting her to admit there's anything bigger than she is- she sees no reason in having a relationship. She's simply too honest for such deception. Barring unusual circumstances, she'll let you know clearly that love is dead before going ahead in total commitment to someone else.
This woman is capable of deep passion and mystical idealism, woven together in strange patterns. In any relationship she feels is real and forever after, there will be no holding back, no feminine wiles, coquettish tricks or silly games. Her love, like her speech and actions, is direct. There's something clean and fresh about the utter simplicity of her emotions, but even so, they often get her into waters way over her head. You may have to tame her a little, but she'll accept it with surprising delight if she really loves you.
Mars females are often career girls. They can handle almost any profession a man can handle, the more challenging, the better. They can also turn a nice ankle or profile in strictly feminine occupations like modeling and acting. It may be difficult to get her to give up her job for you, if it's a real career or profession. And god help you if it is a dream of hers. She may toss it overboard for a period, while she's suffused with the glow of romance and picturing a storybook cottage for two beside the sea (typical of the Arien imagination that leads straight to the happy part and ignores the dull part). But when the cottage begins to need a paint job, the roof starts to leak and the first fine rapture dims slightly, she may be anxious to dig out her social security card again. Let her. She'll be far happier and more loving- even more gentle- if she's allowed to fill her idle hours with something that interests her. Mars emotions, unfulfilled, can look for mole-hills of frustrations to build into huge mountains of trouble. And if that mountain starts to smoke, the resulting explosion will be apocalyptic.
There's practically nothing this woman won't tackle. If it's a challenge or just something she thinks she wants to brighten her life, she'll make some kind of a stab at it whether it's practical or not. I know an Aries woman who was forced for financial reasons to live for several years in two rooms with a husband, five active children and a dog.
That kind of an arrangement can get a little cramped (and any Aries will feel panic at the idea of being crowded like that; this woman is, after all, by nature a loner and needs her own space, even if it is just a corner), and just contemplating it might give a woman with any common sense a few doubts. Not a Mars female. Not when she has set her mind to a task. This one coped somehow, though she may have let it goad her into a few tantrums. In the middle of the situation, when an astrologer read her natal chart and pointed out that her planetary aspects showed a long period of great hardship in her life, she was puzzled and intrigued. "When does it look like it might happen?" she wanted to know.
This same impulsive Aries woman got a sudden urge one day to add another dog to the group camping out in two rooms. She felt the family's male pet needed a female companion. He looked lonesome. Besides, the children thought it was a rollicking good idea. The discovery that the second dog wasn't housebroken threw her only temporarily. Like a determined drill sergeant, she assigned every member of the family their turn at scrubbing the carpet. After she saw that it would never be the same again, she surveyed the situation and made a decision. To get rid of the second dog? Of course not. She was secretly hoping there would be puppies someday soon. The money would just have to come from somewhere to get a new rug. Funny thing- it did. As for the puppies, she was sure some miracle would happen to move the entire crowd into a new apartment before the happy event. Funny thing- it did. Miracles have a way of happening to those who believe in them. Aries women certainly believe. Sometimes to the point of foolishness. Her rash ways can get her into some complicated pickles, and she may have a few gray hairs before she leams how to avoid the same pickle twice. Aries is not noted for learning from experience. The spirit is willing, but the disposition is headstrong. Here is a forehead who will be bruised and bleeding before it is willing to say the wall it is pounding might be dense. There's no use to try to caution a typical Aries female with the biblical warning, "Pride goeth before a fall." Her interpretation of the phrase, since she first heard it in Sunday School, is "When your pride goes, you fall."
Never worry that your Aries girl will succumb to the charms of a wolf. She's immune to wolves and playboys, and in far more danger of being seduced by an idealist with a cause, preferably a lost cause. But even with him, she'll assert her individuality frequently. It will never be completely conquered in the Mars woman, though it can be subdued by the right man. She'll buy you gifts, loan you money, nurse you through illness, and help you get a job. She would offer her life for the right man.
And she'll expect the same from you.
She'll deny it vehemently (she does almost everything vehemently), but she wants a man who can take care of her. When she's happy, you should be happy; when you are down, prepare for her to root out and head-butt the cause. To Aries, love is equal sharing. She'll expect to share your razor, your bank account, your friendships and your dreams. In return, you can share hers. Of course, her razor may be broken, her bank account a little overdrawn, her friendships slightly scattered and her dreams too large for you to swallow. But she's not selfish with them. Keeping a secret from her can drive her wild, and it's not a good idea to drive an Aries wild, for even on good days they are already half-mad. Don't ever embarrass her by your grammar, clothing or behavior in public. She won't embarrass you, at least not in these matters. She expects you to be worthy of being at her side.
To injure her pride or dampen her enthusiasm will almost break her heart. Others will constantly be doing just that to her; the last thing will needs from the man she has picked is for him to do the same to her. The world resents a female who talks back to it, and who thinks she's smarter than everyone else. When she discovers she really doesn't run the universe after all, if you are lucky she'll come running into your arms in tears, her world all dark and dismal, giving you that rare chance to play the lead...for a couple of moments. Then you'll have a chance to see her as she would never allow anyone to see her unless she really cared for them- defenseless and vulnerable, for all her outer confidence. She's not really a brick wall. She'd just like to be. She admires strength and refuses to be the "typical" female. The Aries idealism and optimistic faith in human nature is often dashed to bits by reality. Comfort her with tenderness at these times, and you'll probably never lose her. Always defend her against her enemies. She can never forgive you if you fail to fight for her or take her side, for it shows weakness in you or at the very least, doubt in her. At least she's fun about it. She'll also defend you; often with hilarious, loud results and that is just as she is getting started. An Aries woman will throw away fame or fortune defiantly right in the face of anyone who hurts a friend or loved one of hers. If she loves you, her indignation will have no bounds. These women are nothing if not loyal.
As a partner, she will be quite a handful. There will probably be outside interests, because home will seldom be enough for her creative energies. Do not be offended by anything Aries does, for though it might seem personal, Aries just has to take her own way. Don't expect her to be a happy little cricket, chirping away contentedly by the hearth, nor expect her to be a willing little maid. She'll be a competent enough cook (once she sees a reason to learn how to fix food in a way that you can eat, as well), and she'll keep the house spanking clean- for in cleaning her home she is showing it who is boss. She'll sew on buttons and iron shirts, too, but she won’t like it. Still, she'll do it when it's necessary. (An Aries woman can do almost anything when it's necessary.) Her fire is more like that of a glittering diamond than like the warm, comforting glow of the fireplace. There's undeniably a sharp, brittle side to her nature, and she may agitate you more often that she soothes you, though she means no harm in being herself. But she's exciting and certainly never boring. There are always those moments of softness that belie her strong drive- for a man who has the patience to bring them out. Mars women are always softer inside than they appear on the outside; it is part of her armor to have a smile and a one-fingered salute to any who doubt her, but those who have been really close to her know. Her conversation will be very intelligent and very frequent. Don't hide behind the newspaper at breakfast. She'll expect companionship from you, or you can just scramble your own damn eggs. If you do not care enough to listen to her, she does not have to care enough to bother with you. Remember at all times that she is perfectly happy alone; this is not meant to be an insult to the man she wants, but rather a compliment. It is her way of saying that she can take on the world...but would like to have you with her. After all, it's an adventure out there...What better way to share it than by her saying she wants to have fun and battles with you, not that she needs you. A weak woman "needs" a man- an Aries wants someone. She wants a friend and she wants a lover who understands she will not be made to be a weak, needy female. Again, it will take a strong man to deal with Aries. The male ego does not like a woman who can take care of herself; here's a chance to show you are strong enough to deal with her. It makes Aries think highly of you that you face her after knowing she's impossible. She wants to take pride in you; let her and she will shine even more for you.
You'll rarely find her complaining of illness or fatigue; often it is their death that lets anyone know there was anything wrong with them. Aries only admits to being sick, tired, or hurt when she falls on her face or is bleeding out in such a way that you might notice, though you may have to sit on her to get her to go to bed when she has a raging fever. Any man worth her time will not be afraid to face her wrath by not letting her out of the room until she has slept or just pick her up and tuck her in when she rages herself out. Do not let her hear an "I told you so", just let her think it was her idea that she go to the hospital. Be prepared to have the good manners to not make such a fuss if she face-plants, for here is a woman who can be kissing the floor and will argue she is looking for her contact and no, thank you, she is not tired.
There's only one thing worse than making Aries angry, unless you enjoy creating Fourth of July fireworks in the middle of February. Her rage is like fire and will burn the source of her ire to a crisp in such a short time that the focus of her anger will not realize until it is too late that they made her angry. It is best if she is throwing things and yelling. Worse than her temper is when you push Aries too far. There are few that can be as cold and uncompromising as this bright lady when pushed to her limits, and it's not as if she will not give a person a second chance, or third, or fourth, if she really cares for you. She can be as cold as she can be warm and she can go to her grave as cold as ice and think nothing of it. After all, she tried to let you know you were making her mad. It's not as if it was hard to miss. How could you not hear her as she yelled at you? Or when she hit you in the back of the head? Just one look at a really mad Aries will let you know you have pushed her too far. She is, after all, being as accommodating as she knows how. She told you and told you...and if there's one thing that angers an Aries it is someone not caring enough to take her seriously when she finally says she has had enough. This is not a woman who will forgive once she has been pushed to her limits in this regard. Remember, Aries is not like other signs in feeling that she needs to have people around her, nor will this lady ever want for attention or a friend in a world where her good graces are desired. In that way, Aries is cold, even though she is fire. A loner by nature has a hard time understanding those who need people around them and can not stand to be alone. She can go her entire life completely alone (and even in a crowded room can be as separate from the people around them as the moon is from the end of the universe) and it would be best for those that want to be around her to understand that when she gives a warning, she means it.
Aries will waste little time changing any situation which causes unhappiness, and that can lead to a hasty separation or an impulsive divorce, or just a happy dumping of your belongings outside of her house as a goodbye. She can always be doing something else. It would be a good idea not to let her thoughts go too far down that road.
This woman can be unreasonably temperamental, and create some violent scenes. But her quickly aroused temper will splatter like summer hailstones and soon melt away as long as it's not constantly poked at. She'll never hold a grudge, seek revenge, indulge in self-pity or bitterness and thinks less of someone who whines rather then takes action. It takes something very bad to make Aries just sit and cry, not that you would see her do it...but even as she is crying she will pick herself up, for Aries is hardest on herself and will not allow herself to just do nothing in any situation that requires movement. After an emotional storm, her optimistic, April nature will return like the rainbow suddenly appearing after a shower. Lots of people will tell you an Aries woman is completely masculine, but don't you believe them. She's all woman underneath her flashing, forceful exterior, perhaps too much woman for the average man. But, of course, a knight in shining armor isn't an average man. Are there any lonely, courageous knights out there? This is the fair lady of your dreams, worth all the dragons you'll have to slay to win her.
If you have the courage.
If you can turn the ram into a lamb, you'll have a woman who is honest and passionate, loyal and exciting- though she may be a little impulsive, bossy and independent. Well, you can't have everything, you know. The Aries girl will help you find your lost illusions and she'll have a fierce faith in all your dreams. You don't have any? Borrow some of hers. She has plenty to spare. If you believe in her just half as much as she believes in you, you could make some miracles together.
~Thank you, Linda Goodman. I guess it takes one to know one, huh? </div>
 RadiantFlare · Tue Mar 18, 2008 @ 04:17am · 1 Comments |
