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I don't think anyone reads this, but it gives me peace of mind when I do this:

A year has passed since I lasted updated this journal. I've grown to love myself and cherish the connections I have with people. And in that love, I found that music was no longer for me as a career. I gave it up as both a career and hobby and I have set my path towards a more humble future.

My plans are to become a school counselor with an emphasis on disadvantaged children. I want to help those who need it most, and I want to help as soon as I can.

I gave up music because learning it and devoting my time began to grow toxic on me. The reason I grew to hate myself was my inability to achieve the results I wanted from the work I put in. It seemed no matter how hard I tried, I felt like I wasn't getting things done. I realized that it was because my self efficacy was very low. I had hit a point in my life where I wondered if getting out of bed was worth it. That's when I realized something needed to change.

Music was all I knew for so long. I had studied it for 3 years and in the next 2 years, I'd still be stuck in the same place. I didn't want that. I wanted to move on. I wanted to be more useful. In the end, I saw no viable future in music for me. I was really in it for the people. I wanted to share my love of music with others, thus I took that desire to bring happiness to others by bolstering my ability to empathize and now I am on my way towards a Master's degree. Earlier this month, I've taken the GRE and acquired the desired score to get into my chosen Masters program.

Things have gone so well! But my heart still remains slightly heavy. Though my intentions are pure and true, my relationships with my loved ones are scattered. With my loved ones around me, I will find strength and pass it on to those who also need it.

Wish me luck, to anyone who is reading this. Whatever kindness you grant, I return in multitudes.