No longer here but like a distant memory. It's as if you got up and walked away, told me farewell no matter how much I pleaded for you not to go. How we were in the past no longer feels real but a fantasy.I stopped crying for you but look at me now crying that your not here once again. When I told myself over and over one day you and everyone else will leave. You say it's fine, but it's not damn it. We were close, closer then I could ever imagine. We told each other practically everything but now, we barely speak a word. When did you stop trusting me? When did you find someone else? When was I replaced? When did we drift so much that all we can ever say is hi. It feels like this is the end and the same stupid thing is going to happen again I just know it. Another blow to my heart and spirit. Why does this happen to me? Why do people come into my life only to hurt me? You made me smile, we shared a laugh only for you to vanish the same way you appeared. How many more people must come into my life for one to stay? All i wanted was a friend but i guess I can never have that can I? One of the reasons i don't talk to you is because you won't ever answer. When I'm in pain unable to handle it on my own I text you given it's pointless since I know I'm wasting my time because their wont be a reply but yet I text you with small hope you will respond. I had plans for us but threw them away because how we were died just like my plans. When you appearened in my dreams was the one thing I could ever ask for. Where are you? Why haven't you come back? Why have you also left me just like you real counter part? Why show compassion, be kind and respectful when everyone just leaves. Why get close and share secrets when in the end they keep quiet? I'm tired of this cycle but no matter what I do the cycle continues. Is this what it means for the world to eat you until their's nothing left? My spirit has already been broken that I see greed instead of kindness. If I don't die from an illness then is it a broken heart? I don't want to feel pain anymore, I don't want more people getting close to me only to hurt me. I know you don't want me around, I'm poison and all I do it spit it around. I want to erase my existence from the internet but something holds me back. I have nothing and have lost everyone but yet something keeps me here. A person or a chat, two people I talk too giving them hope when I'm the one who no longer believes.
Friendship is a boat that stays on course but after a while gets off the beaten path.
Friendship is a boat that stays on course-means you have fun, talk all the time, hang out, etc.
but after a while gets off the beaten path-means they walk away or things are no longer the same just an empty seat beside you
'Things will get better Miko'
Don't tell me lies or dare speak those words to me because they won't. I hoped and believed things would get better but they haven't. You can trust a person without telling a lie but in time they will put their trust in someone else. You can be friends with someone for 50 years but guess what? Thats just a number, it doesn't mean anything. What? You expected balloons? A cake? Let me tell you something. A person can appear out of no where and talk to your friend, within that day or minutes they are best friends and act like old friends. When you've been their friend 3 years or more.
If that happened to me I'd loose it. I'd hate the person not my friend but the best thing to do is walk away. Don't look back and leave, three's a crowd and clearly your not wanted or needed.
'Their bad friends just leave them'
Before the 4 friends I have now, I had friends but they left. Didn't get so close but they left, the cycle doesn't change the people do.
