Have i really been so blind to you gaia, for over a year? Most likely yes. I'm not even sure if i will apologize for that. However, now is as good of a time as any to expound some of the plagues of my mind. If you will bear with me.
So i have this friend. My best friend since well, over a decade really. Its sad that i think she must be ashamed of me. Or at least thats the general impression, i really am too much of pushover sometimes. But i fear she thinks she no longer can really...i dont know...connect with me. Since she has delved further into the world of sickly sweet hash and burning liquids when i have chosen to maintain my cleaner than snow idea of them. Ugh, i miss her though. One day she is telling me to beat her over the head with an axe if she ever starts them, and then a month later she tells me she's started doing it with her friends. 'cause everyone else does it.'
Sad thing is. I wish i was more surprised.
Sad thing is she promised it wouldn't effect her realationship with me. Promised she'd be there at my birthday, said nothing in the world could stop her.
Too bad her parents found out that morning, the morning of said birthday.
Too bad she didn't call me for 2 months after. I had to call her. In shock and crying because id just found my year old kitten dead in our pool, because id had to pull her cold body out of the water so my sister wouldnt have too. To bad the call lasted all of 3 minutes.
To bad it took me another 3 months to call her again. On her birthday.
I was one of two of her friends who remembered.
Funny that.
Know what else is funny? We've always been very affectionate friends. My family has always made fun of every person in said family and at one time or another asking them if they are gay, lesbian, the works. A common joke in my family. One she has heard before. The day i found out about her new "hobbys" was the day my sister said one of her jokes.
She hasn't hugged me since.
I think someones priorities are a little skewed.
To bad she's still my best friend.
Too bad i still wish i was surprised.
