"Well I'm not going to force him to love me. If he chooses you over me then I'm going to be happy for him because that's all I want is his happiness. Because that's what it really means to love somebody. You don't understand that."
"You really are a monster. I've never done anything to you and look what happens!"
"I've done things for you that have left me emotionally scarred for life! Look how you treat me!"
"Stop treating me like a child!"
"I can't talk to you!"
Koneko Nya-chan
I can't do this anymore
I am not a child. You call me a child, but you don't know what I have been through.
You don't have any right to judge me and you can't ask me to stop liking Hawksley.
He is my friend and I care for him.
You were my friend and I tried to care for you.
You can only hurt a person so much. You can only scarr a person so much.
I am not going to let myself be hurt anymore.
You are not worth it. Honestly you are not worth it.
I can't be your friend.
You need help.
That is all...
Only she and I really know what's gone between both of us. Our communication fell apart somewhere along the road., and it happens. Friends come, and they drift apart.
This isn't worth dwelling on. Sitting and crying just because she said some hurtful things isn't going to make it all better. It won't make her see, and it won't curb my anger.
We both like Alex. There's nothing to be done for that. We'll just see what happens, because trying to force something to happen will just make things worse. I love him. I want to be with him. That's all there is to it.
---
In other news, I tripped down some stairs with a computer in my arms, yesterday. Rolled off of my ankle at the last minute, so I didn't break anything, but the box the computer was in, its flaps opened and dug into the underside of my arm. Kinda hurt, and I got a wicked lovely bruise. But don't worry, people! The computer was unharmed.
I also found out I got a pay increase by $10! Which means that I'll be able to have more money when I go see Alex! I'll be able to either save it up or spend it on random things while I'm there, which I'll probably do. He likes kiwi strawberry drinks c:
I also slept horribly, am kinda cold, dreamt about Alex at the Magic tournament, woke up in a contemplative mood, and found out that not only am I a sucker for romanticism, but I'm going to learn how to waltz, apparently. o.o
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