gawd...
I'm tired of all this crap now, I'm getting worse than I already am...How can my family still love me...how can anyone love me?It makes no sense with all this crap going on.This is the worst year of my life so far.I went to the hospita twice in these last two days and I swear I might end up in their morgue.Damn my luck, I get in a fight.Then I become alleric to the pain killer we're stocked up on...Well we just finished throwing them out...Why is it like this?Am I God's person to torture?my friend says it's best to let this happen to me now or I won't be able to handle it in a couple years.But, I could've died tonight...And so I started thinking...I don't wanna die...Not yet, and if I die when I'm called upon I want to be cre-mated...I can't stand the thought of me being under the ground until the world ends...I just would rather be lost and forgotten, than be in the ground for many years to come...
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