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I've been hit with the tide of memory today.

Needless to say, one of my teachers at school is having some family troubles that's so similar to my mother's, it scary. I honestly felt bad for her.

Not only that, but something else got me thinking as well. I spotted the very place where my graduation was held, the Memorial Stadium on the KU campus. Heh, the very place where I was late. Yeah, I got there like around one-ish when I was supposed to have been there around noon! xp

There's been a lot of things I haven't forgotten so easily. And sometimes, there's some things that hang on to me like a vicious dog, refusing to let go.

Not only do I not forget, there's also things I don't forgive.

My father, for example...

There's a lot of things I don't forget or forgive him for. I can remember time after time when I lived back in Rhode Island... the amount of times my father and my brother got into fights. And usually it would be over stupid s**t as well. I also remember the number of times my mother and me would sit there on the sidelines helplessly watching those two go at each other's throats. I can even remember so many times the carnage that was left when they got done:

The black eyes...
The bloody noses...
The mess on the floor...
The angry words that were exchanged long after the fight has died down long enough... only to begin once again...

Needless to say, it was my lullaby when I tried desperately to fall asleep. But, because of the violence that happened outside my door that happened almost on a constant basis, night after night, I almost never got any sleep.

I also remember when my brother and my dad got into another fight...

I remember when my brother hit my dad to the point where he nearly broke some of his ribs. I remember picking my father off of the floor and taking him to his bed. And I remember CLEARLY what he said.

"Don't ******** pull me," He'd say.
"I'm not." I'd reply. It was at that point I felt like I wanted to drop him on the floor and make him suffer more.

I even remember the time when I went to grab the phone to call the police, he came up to me and said, right in my face...

"I'll knock your ******** head off!"

Needless to say, I just stared at him. Something spoke to me to not swing at him.

But I wanted to. I SO ******** wanted to, no, ******** KILL him. Just stomp on his a** repeatedly and just MURDER him.

But something told me not to.

Something like that now is starting to really irritate me. One of Sweet Kagome-Chan's friends has turned into a total b***h. She told me about this when I signed onto MSN Messenger a while back. She then sent me the the e-mail of the said journal entry. So, I read it, thinking afterward, "I want to hurt this c**t."

Kagome told me that she wasn't even worth it.

I think she's right.

But something is just eating away at my sanity to then turn me into a friggin' serial killer and just want to beat eight tons of crap outta this Boston b***h and stuff her body into a cardboard box and ship her dead slutty a** to her parents.

Seriously! I can't friggin' take it anymore!

Now, normally I'm an easy-going guy. But I swear to God, if you even remotely piss me off or piss off someone I know, you will catch Hell from me.
But... Alas, I'm not that kind of person.

Lucky for all of you.

Good thing, because otherwise you'd have seen my face on America's Most Wanted.

Man, I am SO glad not a lot of people know my past. If they wanted to know all the bad things that happened to me, I swear to God, they'll be drinking booze after the first set of words. I'll make it a personal guarantee.

I hope those on my friendslist can stomach this... I wouldn't want to be one of them that reads this, anyway.