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At this very moment, I am sitting in the dark with a glowing screen beckoning me to a less lonesome state. I have a friend waiting on me to call but I am bad at multitasking.
At this moment, I am wondering why I am so pessimistic about my future. How I wish it will be and how I think it will be are two different things. I wish I were as good to myself as I was to other people.
Right now, I am making a journal entry of my thoughts because it seems to be a good way to organize them all.
In this instant, I'm waiting for school to start so I can try to be better.
Yeah, I'm listening to a song but I'm just listening to the somberness of it rather than the loveliness of it. No, I'm far too busy sad.
I remember one day, I had a thought and I thought it was a good one. I asked myself why it was so hard to be happy and I just smiled and forgot about it. Thinking how good it would look on paper rather than trying to fix myself. Is sadness the sad way out for me? Am I really so lazy that I can't even try to be happy? I dunno. I just know that I'm trying for myself now but years of bad habits will prove hard to rid of, I'm sure.
Right now I'm pretty blah.