hi friends! have a good halloween?
i've been engrosed with the pokemon manga, o almost forgot about halloween! it's really good. ruby, from the ruby/sapphire series, is uber cuteā„ you'd think he's gay, since he doesn't like to battle or get his pokemon dirty. he even carries a sewing kit, a knitting kit, and a make-up kit around with him for his pokemon!
while reading the manga, red (the main character who's more commonly known as ash) reminded me of alex. uber brave and willing to fight for people he just met.. i miss alex. if i could have just one more chance to ee him, i'd tell him how i've felt about him for the past five years.. but i know he would never return the feeling.. so why bother right? but it's something i'll have to do sooner or later. i feel bad for not beeing totally honest with him for the two years i spent with him.. maybe he'll respect my honesty and like me as i like him... wishful thinking.. it's these insane unobtainable dreams that keep us humans going, huh? i just wish that one day something will go right for me. my main goal is to die happy with no regrets. i refuse to die untill i've tied the ends in my life that keep me from being happy. i need to make a list..
1. appologize to that one amber girl in kindergarden for whatever reason
2. tell alex how i feel
3. get back the two and a half years he stole from me somehow
4. find a way to forget how happy i was with mr. jerk face so i don't sicken myself any further
5. appologize to zach for being such a jerk just before we broke up
6. hope to you're imaginary god that alex will take me.
7. finish writing star.
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