I don't know it was really random, but I was watching Transformers. And when the guy was screaming for someone to help... That made me thing about Jerry's death all over again... Because I remember screaming for someone to help my brother! But know one would come! And I was just crying and screaming bloody murder... and every little thing now triggers it... I just start thinking about Jerry and then I feel like crying... But I hold all my feelings in... until one day I'm just going to brake down crying...
About 2 weeks ago at school the councilors asked if I wanted to join like a support group... I said no of course... If someone knows me well enough... they know I don't like sharing my sad feelings and especially around people I don't know... I just bottle everything up...
There will always be a pain, a hole... in my heart... that will never ever go away... and it's hard to move on... because sometimes I feel that there is no hope at all...
I know this is depressing... but I can't help it because I loved him so much...
maimaikittymeg Community Member |
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