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I never understood what it meant to be alone but I have the strongest feeling that I'm getting closer. Time beckons with loneliness but mine only. I guess the only reassuring part is the fact that the person that's leaving me will be in a better place. One that will help him be who his parents wanted to be. ((Not heaven or jail or bootcamp)
I'm losing myself here. Every time I'm reminded of it..I cry. I HATE to cry but I have to. Actually, I like to cry. It relieves whatever I'm feeling. I hate being in situations in which I cry. Meaning, I hate crying, so yah.
I don't want to be alone but I am. It just feels inevitable. I may shake it off as one of those "things in life that just happen" things but it's more to me. This is family taken away from me damnit.....It really hurts.