there is pain. . . much pain in my heart. it yerns for something very difficult to obtain . . . my heart is crying but my eyes i forbid . . . my true wish is to be close to someone. its just so hard to let people in. even now my heart flutters not wanting the smallest truth to be known. not wanting people in . . . but at the same time the fluttering is exitement of finally opening up. i hate not being comfortable telling anyone my feelings. even my closest freind doesnt know what i feel about many things. they may think they know but im sure its not right. the person i am is a bad person . . . i lie to everyone ad often, i am selfish and uninteligent. i have no motivation. i want to open up badly but i just cant. i dont want to be vulnerable. im weak enough i dont want to be defenseless. i often wonder many things. thoughts run around in my head if only i knew the answers . . . my heart screams dont post youve said way to much my mind says no one reads them anyway so it dosent matter what time 2:10
kitten-slits · Tue Aug 14, 2007 @ 07:11am · 1 Comments |