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im so pathetic, i dont know how to act around people so i dont do anything and the way my face is normally makes people think im glaring at them or that i look sad sweatdrop most of my life ive been alone, im so lonely, i wish someone understood me. most of my good friends though out my life have moved away or we just spent less and less time together. my friends now must think that i hate them. im like the complete opposite of my sister. i want to be like her but not like her. she ends up doing some stupid things and i end up being mean to her because of it (i cant really help it, i guess im sadistic, im pretty sure i get it from my dad, im also masochistic)
theres some people that keep telling me i should talk more, but about what. i dont really do anything so i have nothing to talk about.
life is so confusing, sometimes i wish that i didnt exist. im not talking about killing myself. i would never do that. it would put all the time that people have spent on me to waste, money too. it would also waste the time of others to go to my funeral. sad how i just think of myself as a waste
besides i have no right to do suicide, there are a lot of other people that are living it harder than me, compared to them im living the good life, the only reason my life is bad is because of myself, if i were more positive than there would be no problem with my life