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Worst start of day ever. Forgot my wallet and didnt realise before I got to the bus sentral. So I had to walk back home in pouring rain. Was late for work. And I havnt really woken up yet. Cant wait to get home. Gonna make myselfe a nice dinner and take a loooong hot shower.

I have been single for over two years now. And I`m in no rush to get a new one. But sometimes, I wish I had someone to love. I was in love with co-worker this summer, but he moved to London and my love needs nurish.

Well, love will come. Its just a matter of time. And as long as I have good friends, I`m happy 3nodding

I just felt like typing a bit. God knows if I will press the "submit" button. I just need to let some steam out. I`ll probably let som tears out later. But not yet. I`m not ready to cry just yet.
I made up my mind today. I wont let anyone see this side of me ever again. I`m so tired of people who stop calling me when they see this side. Am I really that ugly? Do I make them so uncomferteble? Is it me or do I remind them of something?
Nine Inch Nails - Henry Rollins on Vocals, will make me fel a bit better.

I never update here. But today, I want to. I`m sitting here alone, drunk. A friend was over earlyer and we made cake and had alot of vodka. And we are discussing hos our apartment will look. When we find it...

I played a character in a music video today... I played myselfe. I was very fun. I cant belive they used three hours just filming me doing everyday stuff...

Got a new job. Its really hard work and very boring, but the pay is good and thats all I really care about=)

I know a couple. I have known them for over a year now and we are really good friends and hang out alot all three. Sometimes I even spend the night at their place because its to late for me to go home.

The last mounth I have started to notice that he is the last one to go to bed and the first one to get up and into the living room where I sleep. I just thought it was because his girlfriend is very tired. But last time i was there, the wibes got stronger. Him and me where alone in their living room because his girlfriend was at the store. We started to talk about working out and suddenly he started to flex his arm musckles... And the he told me how sex is the best way to work out...

Am I wrong in thinking that he likes me more then a friend or am I totally off? Can anybody give me some advice on how to deal with this without destroying out friendship? I am not gonna date him no matter what.

I just found out that I have lost 6 lbs! Just 4 more nad I have reached my goal!
Had my second driving lesson today. In thge middle of the rush hour... That was scary...

Being me is not always that easy. I want to die, but I cant do that. To mny people care. And I still care. But soem days I feel like my heart is going to burst and that hurts.

I drink too much, I like to do drugs and I have not enough fingers to show you how many people I have slept with. I do all of these things to get away from myselfe. For an hour. Or a day.

I have found one way to get away, and that is to play RPG`s with my frinds. The kind where we all get together and plat games like Vampire, Orpheus or Kindred of the East.

Today I was at the doctors office. She was takung my blood pressure and I was hoping she would take notice of all the scars and send me to a therapist, but she didnt. Maby I will get some help on my own. Maby.