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Letter From Em To Jamie

Dear Jamie,
Things have been weird lately. My heart is often sighing. Why did you move? This doesn't help my anger issues, which you know I've had since grammar school. Can't you parents just have let you stayed here? After your depart I went up to my room, and cried, the longest I have ever done. And you can see that I have started crying because there are wet spots. And soon there'll be black mascara streaks under my eyes. And I have no one here next to me to wipe them away, and to give a bright smile and say 'Everything'll be ok, trust me,' then hug me tight, and make me feel better. Why are parents so difficult? They don't understand! My parents are gone by the way, they left me here, they moved, to a different house, and they left me here. They told me they couldn't take it anymore, they just had to get out of here. I'm sorry if I'm making you cry, I don't mean to, but my life is a swirling black abyss. My room and the whole house is a wreck but my room is the worst, there's broken glass, broken drawers, I went on a rampage the other day I freaked out completely and now the house is a mess. I deserve this horrible life, and now I see why you left, you don't deserve me as a friend. I'm they worst idiot that walked to planet.
I have been trying not to cut myself but that hasn't worked out, my life is just too dreadful. I've been cutting myself in my parents closet, on their bed, their floor everywhere. The blood is everywhere and my arms are bright red. I'm glad this house is far off into the woods, no one knows it exists except you me and my parents. There are no tax incomes so I don't have to go to work. Or school, I stay home now... All the time, I cry and writhe in pain. I don't sleep so there are dark circles under my eyes. My mascara is always running down my face, my dark shoulder length hair is always in my face. Why am I so miserable? I'm worse then I was before I met you. Remember when you found me hiding in the classroom closet? Haha.
Sincerely,
Em

I wrote this last summer and didn't show it to anyone, I don't know why I wrote about an emo girl, I usually don't....