'TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS...
And all through the CB,
Not a Gaian was resting, circulating like a meme.
The noobs were all trampled outside on the front lawn.
Crying and begging, "PLZ GIF MII STUFF, BAWWW!!"
The Regs were all busy, making rapid jokes about sex.
And namedropping, namedropping, oh who to namedrop next?
And I in my thread began counting my cash,
Waiting for The Friskeh Dingoh to begin an annual emo bash.
When from deep in the forum, there arose such a din.
I abandoned my trolling to see what was happening further in.
Away to the drama I rapidly clicked.
Dodging the swears and the comments, trying not to be picked.
The stench of trolls and idiots permeated the air.
I was not even surprised to see STFU SRSLY mixed in there.
And not even slightly to my surprise did I see
It was Squashum and FireFlamez, I mean, who else would it be?
As the rest of us watched all of the hilarity,
As the two fought religion, quite terribly.
Many message coursed through the wire,
And but who else do I see through the fire?
"See XXX LAX! See Popetoast! See them as reindeers anew"
Shouted The Other, Pokey-Mew.
"Off in to the night of the Chatterbox skies
Post away, Post away As a great night to all!"
As they bumbled away for the night,
I saw a few others in the computer light.
Homicidal Buttsecks and Radioactive Suicide Came through,
And then came the posts, who knew if they were true?
Though the sounds of the first fight rang loudest.
There was going to be no clear victor, to be honest.
No one could quite voice their opinions the best.
But suddenly, reason was found at Lettuce Prey's behest.
Another fight caught the corner of my eye.
I regretfully turned away and said my goodbyes.
It was Duggers McNuggers and The Fainting Goat, what a shock!
The two were collaborating around a sinister plot.
Japanazi joined in with the fray.
To be assured, this would be a most wonderful holiday.
And a climax arose, one that was most epic.
In a clatter of trolling, the noobs were all hectic.
But just before I clicked "Logout",
I heard a loud, triumphant shout.
It blared over every other thread, more important than those.
But don't tell the scene kids, they'd be offended, oh noes!
A chorus of [Pandemon], B A N N 3-D, and Em3rald
Moltena, TnTease, MinaMiru, and JazzyMonkey
A T M A, Clinger, and Wixi
They all gathered as a dangerous wave
And I heard them all shout, this message they gave
"Merry Christmas to all, and to all a New Year!
But we don't give a s**t about your story, gtfo of here!"
Serious props to RinaOfTheDead,
For writing a whole bunch of this with -CASUAL ROUGH SECKS-
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