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The one person that I love seems so far away right now...............
I have never felt so alone
all I want is to hold her and kiss her and tell her that everything is ok
she is the one person that believes in me and trusts me with all of her heart
but I......I seem so complicated to her......as if she just can't figure me out
I am trying to start a new life with her
i want this, to be with her all of the time.......but i can't just leave
I want to so bad!!! Why am I still here?!?!?!
I should be with her....enjoying my new life with her.
But these obligations that i have to meet, I have come to the conclusion that they are to blame.
I hate it....HATE IT!!!!!!
that the one thing I want I can't have.......
I would have been back so much sooner.......things would be so much better,
but this distance complicated everything....emotions start to become so unclear
and worrying starts to set in..........
these feelings are what is killing this love that we have
if I had the choice....i would have never left her.....
we would still be happy together caring and growing together,
learning about each other.
I hope that she realizes that I will be there soon....just not soon enough
I don't want to lose her.....not like this.....I would rather die then this distance be the end of us.

I truly love you Monica, I hope that you can wait just a little longer.........