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Me, Myself, and I - Chapter Eight (Flashbacks)
I quickly scanned through the menu; all of the words I read mostly came out as blurs and muffled sounds. Because I knew that Justin was glowering down at me while I hid my face behind the menu, he was probably murmuring impatient comments like “Today please…” or “Can she get any slower?”
“Uh… I’ll take the…” I chose the first thing that came into my mind, “___.” Tasha nodded happily again and then turned to Justin who just asked for another refill of coke. Leave it to Justin to eat before taking friends (And me…) somewhere to eat. I looked back down at what I ordered and realized two things, one: I couldn’t finish that dish even if I wanted to, it would fill three of me at once. And there’s only one of me here… And two: … I hate shrimp.
“Key, I thought you hated shrimp.” Jack muttered, basically reading my thoughts. He chuckled under his breath before looking back down at the menu. “Key, mind if I split with you? That’s what I wanted anyway.’
I’m sure that he could eat the void of food that I wouldn’t possibly be able to finish, so I eagerly accepted his proposal. He turned back to Tasha, who wrote it down on her notepad and skipped off to the kitchens. Justin watched her leave, and once she was gone, he turned to us both. His arms were laid across one another in front of him on the table. “She’s starting to get on my…-“ He stopped, he gave Jack a queer look of confused bewilderment. I turned to see what Justin was looking at, and saw Jack was doing the thing where you breathe on the front of the spoon and then use the moisture to grip it to your nose. I blinked at him when he looked at me with the spoon dangling off the end of his nose, nodding with his breathe when he spoke, “What?” He asked ##########. I had to turn away to keep from bursting into obnoxious giggles.
Justin didn’t seem as amused as I was. “Dude, take that off your face, you look ridiculous.”
“It’s not ridiculous!” Jack replied with a shocked rebuttal. “I just wanted to see if it would stick…”
“Yes, and now you know it does. Take it off.” He gave him that authoritative glare that I always cowered under; Jack didn’t seem any less appeased with himself, even with the death glare drilling into his head.
But I had to agree with Justin on one thing, it did make him look like and idiot, “Jack… Come on, take off the spoon.”
Jack laughed at the way I’d termed it before pulling the spoon off of his nose and chuckling under his breath, “It’s fun to make yourself look like an idiot some of the time.”
“You just do it a lot more than normal…” I heard Justin mutter from the side while covering his face.
I couldn’t help but laugh at that.
A plate came down onto the table with a clatter as Tasha smiled ruefully and simultaneously gave Justin his coke as well. “Enjoy!” she chirped before once again skipping through back to the kitchen.
To most people, the meal looked appetizing. The long lush noodles covered in prim white Alfredo sauce. But the jumbo shrimp on my plate that were staring back at me gave me a loss of appetite. I shoved the plate away roughly, watching as Jack pulled the plate away from me.
I blinked at him as he raised an eyebrow at me skeptically, “You don’t want it?”
I looked back at the shrimp. I almost felt green with sick. I shook my head roughly as I turned away from the plate to keep the pungent smell from entering my nostrils.
Jack shrugged, “Suit your self.” He muttered, pulling the plate to himself. He stabbed at a shrimp and shoved it into his mouth, munching obnoxiously. At least he chewed with his mouth closed…
“So… How’s Alyssa?” Jack asked Justin while stabbing at another shrimp after swallowing the first.
Justin sighed and nodded, continuing his game with the ice in his cup, “She’s doing fine. We went out last night… So I guess we’re doing alright.”
Hn… So he had been awake that night… Was he just ignoring Jack’s phone call that time?
I mean… Flexible parents like his must let him stay out after midnight.
… Or maybe he was too distracted to notice the phone.
I shuddered at that thought; I didn’t want to think about why I took it so personally. Either way, I just put a hand to my head and combed through my hair with my fingers. Damn it, get off the subject.
“Hn. That’s good,” Jack replied with a smile and a nod, “Nice to see that you have a girlfriend. Your loathing from being single got on my nerves.”
“Uh huh, single. Like you are now.’
I turned and looked back to Jack, who just smiled and shrugged, “Guess I am.” He admitted, not really showing any shame in it. He looked over to me and grinned a bit wider, “What about you Key?”
“Hm…?” I asked stupidly, not really sure about his question.
“You single?”
Ew, if he was asking me out, I was sure to barf. But It was rude not to answer anyway, “Who, me? Of course, I send guys walking.”
“Ha. Ever thought of the cause for that?” Justin asked coldly with a sick smirk on his face before taking another sip of coke. I winced at the response, this guy was heartless. Surely. He didn’t even seem human.
Where was the Justin I once knew?
“Oh shut up, Justin.” Jack replied defensively, before wrapping some of the pasta around his fork and shoving it in his mouth, “Key is fine. I’m sure that she could get a guy’s attention if she wanted to.”
HA! Yea right.
“Uh huh.” Justin muttered, finishing off his coke.
So… Justin didn’t like me at all. Not as a friend, or any other way. It was sad to think that I could be hated, and not know why. Was that just Justin now? Full of hate and spite toward people who used to think of him as an important part of their life? I couldn’t stand it, that’s what he really was to me. He was a nice understanding person she could always go to. When they went to the movie nights at their elementary school, we’d lay on a unfolded sleeping bag in the gym and eat popcorn.
We’d laugh at one of us screamed at a scary part (… Mostly me.)
We’d even tackle each other down on the blanket and start tickling each other.
But… We were kids. Stupid kids. Showing off feelings of affection for one another as people who were thought to be destined to be best friends to the end… We would share everything with each other. Secrets, food, drinks. A kiss.
I gasped as my mind slowly unraveled that mystified judgment to myself. Everything came back to me. The dawning of chills as the rain fell down on my shoulders, soaking me, freezing me to the bone, and making the strong winds more noticeable as they beat at my black trench coat around my shoulders. The rain dripped down and soaked my hair to my face, sticking and making me shiver.
But once I was in his arms, nothing was cold. Nothing felt wet… Nothing felt wrong.
Oh my god.
“Key? You ready to go? … Key!”
“Huh?” I gasped, jerking my head up from my folded arms on the table, “What? Who?”
“We’re ready to go…” Jack muttered, already standing from the table with Justin at his side, looking through cash in his wallet.
“Oh…” I muttered, slowly slipping out of the booth and walking up next to Jack, “Okay.” I squeaked, not quite sure why. My throat felt closed up. My chest was heaving. Everything felt cold.
Jack smiled and nodded, “its fine.” He muttered in forgiveness of me, though Justin sat silent. “Come on.” He cheered, grabbing my hand and basically dragging me out the door. I heard Tasha’s faded farewell, but once the door closed, all I heard was the rumbling of strong wind in my ears, racing around my eardrums.
“Sheesh. When did it get so windy?” Jack muttered, looking around and blinking away from the wind that hurtled at his face. His darkish red hair ruffled wildly.
I shrugged, looking at Justin who exited last. He seemed as surprised about the wind as I was, his black hair feigned away from framing his face and showed his pale skin and the bright almost fluorescent blue eyes. He got to the car and unlocked it quickly, sliding inside. Jack took to the back of the car this time, smiling at me, “You can sit in the front.” He chimed before closing the door to the backseats.
Damn it, I hate Jack now.
I sighed in reprise as I opened the door to the front of the car and got inside. I closed the door once I’d gotten into the car and let the instance heat blasting from the car’s heater hit my face. My entire body felt warm and fuzzy now, but I could still hold onto the clammy aura around me as I felt Justin lean away from me in the driver’s seat. He stepped on the gas and backed out of the parking lot, driving away from Chili’s. I sighed and looked out the window; the car was so quiet it felt dead. I sighed once again, and was grateful when Jack brought up a conversation. “So how’s Janice doing with her redecorating?”
“It’s okay I guess…” Justin replied, looking not completely keen on the conversation of his new mother, “She wants to basically rip my room apart though. I’m not completely happy about it.”
“Ouch,” Jack muttered in reply, frowning, “That must suck. I hope she doesn’t make it all white and doilies like the rest of your house.”
“Yeah, me too…”
I felt completely out of the conversation, what with the fact that I had no idea Janice was wanting to change that house around. The house was beautiful as it was. I couldn’t believe someone would want to change it… Besides…. Justin’s room wasn’t that bad… Felt homier than the rest of the place. I swallowed and tried to find something to stare at so that I could tune Justin and Jack out, but everything was moving so quickly. I tried to look at the clouds, but the entire sky was grey and clouded. Too much for me to look at it. Gives me a headache.
Before I knew it though, we skidded to a stop. I blinked and looked out the window; we were next to an apartment complex. But it wasn’t an older one like mine with the moss growing grotesquely over the sign that said “Welcome”. It looked new, fresh… And just… I don’t know.
“Ah. So that’s why you wanted to get out.”
“Shut up,” Justin muttered, his face peaking red on his face, “She wanted me to come by…”
Jack snorted in response to this as Justin parked in a lot, “Yea. Well, wonder if she knows that you brought guests.”
“She knows. Stop getting weird.” Justin turned off the car and looked over at me to respond and unbuckle myself. It took me about thirty seconds or so before I even realized that I was supposed to get out, “Who… Who are we visiting?”
“Oh,” Jack muttered, seems he’d already unbuckled and now he’d opened my car door for me, “You know about Justin’s girlfriend Alyssa, right?”
I blinked and looked up. My heart was wrenching inside of my chest. The pain in my chest was almost unbearable and I didn’t know why. But somehow I kept a straight face as I nodded. “Yeah. You guys told me about her at the restaurant…” My voice almost came out in a squeak as I spoke. My lungs felt like they were tied into knots as I unbuckled myself with shaking hands.
His… Girlfriend…
Justin’s Girlfriend.
Stepping out of the car, I had that feeling of when you stand up too fast. I blinked and tried to see through the weird white that blurred in front of my vision. Jack helped me stay up straight before I looked back up at the apartment complex, “… Well…. Let’s go.”
Justin nodded, not responding to my anxiety, as he walked up to the stairs and headed for her apartment.
Justin’s girlfriend…
The memories started to come in blurs once again. His smooth hard lips as they pressed close to mine. The comfortable darkness as I closed my eyes and let him pull me in. The rain that had fallen, caressing my cheeks with so much tenderness that I’d almost cried.
I remembered coming out of that darkness once.
But I don’t think I’ll be able to do it again.
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