My biggest fear is being left alone with no one and I am dangerouly close to that fear being a reality. In all honesty there are only 3 people I really trust with all my heart and I love them more than anything. I won't say who those 3 are but they ahve a pretty good idea if its one of them. I just hate not being near them becaseuwas if my coputer messes up or something? I would die without my friends on here. It's such a fragile line I walk having mostly internet friends but they are more ral to me than most people I know in real life. I am so alone it here that it hurts to even get up in the mornings because I will have to face the day alone. I know if I had friends that maybe that would be different. There are people here that are my friends but after all I've been through can I really trust anybody? Is that why Im alone bcause I cannot trust?I know that I have real friends on here but what happens when they can't get on or we have computer problems? I don't want to think about it. I just hate being so lonely that I have to resort to cutting to make me feel like anything is real....
