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I think that as you grow up your heart becomes more callous. Your get use to disappointment, you less easier to hurt. Or perhaps you’ve learned to fool yourself into thinking everything is alright. Your used to the hurts of the world and learn to cope with it’s coldness. Quite disheartening I suppose. Where did the simple wonders of childhood go?

I think that people, as individuals, are lonely. Always the doubt, the fear, that no one would cry at your funeral. Selfish perhaps, but I suppose everyone deserves at least that. Why do we base our lives on being remembered? Can we not just live in the happiness we bring others, bask and move on?

It’s so sad I’m an eye for an eye kind of girl. I envy those who simply give and expect nothing in return. Their not laid down to disappointment, and receiving something is all that much better. And even though I know this, I can’t change. It’s encrypted in my DNA, part of my personality.

True love is something I expect to happen, something that is going to happen one day, just like puberty or graduating. I think the thought of it just passing me by is to horrid to think of. Perhaps deceiving myself is going to lead to disappointment, but I just want to shine in the imaginings of my heart.

It’s horrible to not feel like you belong. Does anyone? Does anyone not have that fear of being the odd one out, the unimportant friend, expendable and unimportant. Or perhaps it’s just me?
Is happiness an illusion? Friendship? Perhaps friendship is only a survival skill of grouping together for protection. Perhaps love is just a strong will of wishing to ultimately mate.

Sometimes I just wish to jump into stories, where the writer makes sure that these things are very much real. It’s just.. I’ve never seen or felt it in real life. A life where super heros have dirty secrets and friends are disposable.

Great in writing, impossible in action. Love to me. Isn’t it sad. Do you feel sorry for me? My life is so sad, yet when I try to feel sorry I have to think that so many lives are so much more horrible.

Why do we blame God for everything? Most of the hardships placed on us were created by humans. Quite a burden on our creator all mighty. If you believe in such a thing.