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Lonvi's Journal...
What I am thinking at that particular moment...
Desperation
TW
Mentions self-injury and was written in a place of brokenness.

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Show me 100 smiles~ And I'll show you 10,000 tears~ show me 100 laughs~ and I'll show you many more fears~ why can't you see through this?~ all of these silly lies~ that happy girl you see's really broken~ why can't you see what's on the inside?~ the scars you see grow fainter~ but take a better look~ she just found better ways to hide it~ her soul is what they took~

A million little pieces~ she shatters on the floor~ all you see is smiles~ all she sees is a whore~ dirty little secrets~ words never to be spoke~ little sweet reminders~ of a soul they completely broke~ what you see is an illusion~ it's not really me~ oh, how I wish that you could see~ I'm still yearning to be free~

The girl you see is dying~ a little more each day~ she's scared to let you see her~ for she can't find the words to say~ she's begging for a reason~ just one to stay alive~ but as the darkness consumes her~ she's just run out of time~ and if I let you see her~ would you know what to say? All she really wants to hear~ is simply "it will be okay"~

Show me 100 smiles~ and I'll show you 10,000 tears~ show me 100 laughs~ and i'll show you many more fears~ the facade you see is failing~ she can no longer hide~ her faith is growing weary~ soon you'll see what lies inside~ she can't stop the blood from falling~ her hope's been deeply snuffed~ she's running out of choices~ there's no more room for her to stuff~

A million little pieces~ all things she kept pushing down~ dirty little secrets~ reasons why she's being drowned~ will you still walk beside me?~ even if you really knew?~ for all the times I've been there~ now I'm really needing you.

-Ellie Grace





 
 
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