Maybe I'm being a chicken or over dramatic. I don't know.
So, growing up, I was always told I wasn't allowed to date.
In elementary school, I didn't care so I had like, 10 boyfriends. If you were mean to me, it was over.
In middle school I gave in to peer pressure and I didn't know how to say no (didn't want to hurt feelings). I had like 5 boyfriends which is way better than elem.
Two guys liked me and I was already dating one. The second guy asked me over facebook and I didn't want to hurt his feelings, so I said yes! I was so dumb.
They both hated me and I hurt their feelings. That was the WORST experience of my life. Smh
I cried, hard, the next day. After that, I started saying no.
I think I had one more. He was in my band class (not a band nerd stare ) and he was really nice.
We dated for a few months and then people started saying it was weird that we haven't kissed! I thought kissing was gross, I'm not gonna lie.
I broke up with him, though. I can't remember why. He was really sad.
I had one boyfriend in High School.
I'd say he was my real boyfriend because I said yes because I wanted to.
We had drama class together and a lot of flirting went on.
He's spanish and he had such a sexy voice! Sometimes he would speak to me in spanish- thinking about it gets me riled up, lol
But he was only my bf because he moved, my mom was more comfortable with that.
We kissed once. It was a long distance relationship.
At the time, I was going through a lot of crap with my dad and we basically had no relationship, so my tolerance for guys was a straight 0.
I told him I wanted to be friends, he was pretty upset, then some misunderstandings went down and he hates my guts.
I NEVER wanted to hurt him! I was still growing and learning, so I don't feel bad, I just wish he would stop hating me.
He is such a great guy...with a sexy voice, lol
I've kissed one other guy, a black dude.
I was really nervous and unsure, but I decided to be bold.
He wanted me to give him a bl*wjob, but like stare really? We've made out three times! Besides, he flirted with other girls! I wasn't going to do something like that for no reason- idk.
Anyway, I was scared. I've never even seen one before!
He pulled it out, I squeezed my eyes shut, he let me touch it, then I ran.
I couldn't do it.
Sigh...so, and I being a chicken? I just feel like, when you do that stuff with someone, there has to be some type of feeling or...something! Idk
I can flirt, talk smack, and I have a vivid imagination (especially after today) but my experience with other stuff is very limited.
Is that a bad thing?
I feel like, maybe it is, but maybe it's not? I'm not sure...
Jooombiiine Community Member 
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