There were three things driving Sakura absolutely insane.
First, of all the places in the world to set a story… someone had chosen Forks, Washington? Just because it was cloudy?!
Second, the name was really… is “in bad taste” the best way to put it? Seriously though, “Forks”? For a place with vampires and werewolves?
And third: if she didn’t become an angst-filled, depressed, and utterly socially awkward lovesick teenager, blood would be spilt. Who’s blood that may be, she wasn’t quite sure yet. But it would be, like, really bad.
And… wait, was that three already? Oh, one more then. Fourth, she had to choose whom to spend the rest of her life with. Bachelor number one: a blood-sucking sparkly vampire. Bachelor number two: a werewolf that was in great need of anger management classes. Who would get the rose? Apparently only fangirls held the power to decide… and they would probably be the ones to spill the blood, in case you were wondering.
Chapter One
Welcome to Spoons… Huh? Oh, Well, Spoons Sounds Cooler
“Ah, I slept in late!”
Sakura raced down the stairs, tripping over the pair of blue jeans she had randomly torn from its hanger in her closet. It was her first day in a new school — being late would not be a good first impression.
“Don’t say I didn’t try to wake you, Monster.” A young man was sitting at the breakfast table eating the pancakes he had prepared.
Sakura smashed her foot on her brother’s with as much force as she could. Touya was such a pain! Ignoring her fiendish brother’s cries and moans, she grabbed a cold slice of toast and slathered grape jelly on one side before all but stuffing it down her throat. She grabbed her backpack and the keys. “I’m leaving! Have a good day at work!”
She heard Touya calling out to her as she climbed into the old Chevy pickup. “Try not to act like yourself! Maybe you’ll meet some friends!”
Muttering some choice words to herself, she started the ignition and shifted into reverse; the Chevy gave a nasty yet somehow comforting lurch as it backed out. Narrowly avoiding the cruiser, she made her way into the street, shifted to overdrive (yes, it was that old), and made her way through the insanely green landscape.
Perhaps some back-story is in order? Let’s see… introduction of main character: check. Vague and corny prologue: check. No real plot elements encountered: check. Yup, seems now’s the time.
Sakura Kinomoto: sixteen years old, high school junior, and impossibly cheery. Until just yesterday, she had lived and attended school in her wonderfully beautiful desert world — Arizona. She had loved everything there: the people, the landscape and the heat from the summer sun that never seemed to scorch her pale complexion.
So… why the hell would she go to Forks, Washington, which had to be the absolute most gray, rainy, cold, and utterly depressing town in all of the world?
Well, earlier in the year Touya had moved all the way to the dismal city to be some lousy police officer. To be completely honest, Sakura thought it was ridiculous. Why he couldn’t just search for an open slot for the job someplace in Arizona or maybe even Nevada, she would never know. At the time, however, she had considered it a blessing. No more annoying brother griping at her or threatening to beat her boyfriends to a pulp. With him gone, the house would be left to just her and her father, Fujitaka.
Her feelings toward the subject changed a few months after Touya up and left. See, Sakura’s mother Nadeshiko had passed away quite a while ago, when Sakura was only three years old. Sakura refused to be one of those angst-ridden teens just because a parent had passed away, so suddenly wishing for a female presence in the house wasn’t the problem. Actually, Fujitaka was all that she really needed, seeing as he was the absolute best father in the entire world. After all, how could she really miss something she couldn’t remember?
The problem was, without Touya there, Fujitaka was devoting his time to making sure Sakura was perfectly fine. And that was definitely not fine with Sakura. He had too much to worry about as it was, with his job at the University. When he was called to help with an archeological dig, she made her mind up — she was going to go live with Touya.
After all, she’d be out of the house in less than two years anyway. Of course he’d been shocked. But after many long discussions and mighty tempting offers from Fujitaka, she made her decision final.
Then her brother had been so… nice as to get Sakura a car for when she arrived. Turns out it was an extremely old and decrepit ’53 Chevy pickup truck that she had suspected he had only gotten because it was free and was sure to make her mad. To his chagrin, she loved it. Something about it just seemed… right. Plus, it was better to love it and annoy the hell out of Touya than to mope and complain, giving Touya complete satisfaction.
That’s the basic story. Not too terribly exciting. But of course, that’s without super-powerful vampires and werewolves chewing up the furniture.
A few miles away from the house, the rain started pouring down like she’d never seen in Arizona. Careening out of control and hydroplaning a couple of times, she finally slowed to a measly ten miles per hour. Great, now she’d be late for sure.
Within hardly any time at all, though, she saw the sign for the high school, with SPARTANS on it in big red letters.
It didn’t take long to find a parking spot. How could it, with only 358 people in the entire school? The attendant in the office gave and explained Sakura’s schedule to her before she headed off, just a little late, to her first period class.
First period was a piece of cake, seeing as she had studied most of the topics already. The only problems were the stares from the other students. Since the town was so small, the news that Officer Touya’s younger sister was coming to Forks was probably the hottest gossip. Ah well, it would pass in a few days at time, so Sakura returned the smiles and acted as friendly as possible.
The bell rang. As she packed away her new textbook and the notes she had been taking, the girl in the desk next to her approached. She had long black hair that curled and waved at the ends and she had a very modest way of dressing, with lots of lace and ribbons. She smiled pleasantly at Sakura. “Are you the newest celebrity, Sakura Kinomoto?”
“Well, I’m not exactly a celebrity,” she replied sheepishly.
The girl extended a hand. “My name is Tomoyo Daidouji. I have to say, Sakura, you’re most assuredly the cutest person I’ve ever met!”
Sakura could feel the blood rush to her face. She’d been told she was cute before, with her cropped windswept hair and large green eyes, but not by someone she’d just met.
“What class do you have next?”
“Um…” Sakura checked the schedule. “Trigonometry.” She made a face. Math had to be the absolute worst subject in the entire world. No matter how nice the teacher was she would still hold a grudge.
Tomoyo’s face lit up. “That’s my next class as well! Actually…” She glanced over at Sakura’s schedule. “We have all but fourth and fifth period together. How about we walk together to class?”
Sakura blinked stupidly for a second before smiling warmly. “Sure!”
It turned out Tomoyo’s mother was the head of a large company in Seattle. When Sakura was asked about her parents on the way to class, she told about her father’s job at the university teaching archeology. When inquired about her mother, she told the truth.
First mistake.
“Oh, that must be terrible! To not know one’s own mother….” She shook her head in disbelief. “You must be so depressed!”
She often got this when she mentioned her mother. So Sakura just shook her head. “No, I’m really not. I got tons of love from my father, so I never felt neglected.”
Tomoyo seemed to go suddenly hard of hearing. “Poor thing… hiding your deep, torturous angst with a warm smile. It’s so mature and depressing, Sakura-chan. I bet you had many gentleman callers back in Arizona.”
“No, really I…. wait, huh?”
“Guys seem to go for the angst-ridden teenagers, especially the rather beautiful men.” She said it as though it were the most obvious, logical thing in the world.
Before Sakura could express her confusion any further, they reached the Trigonometry class. As Sakura expected, it was an hour of complete torture. Spanish wasn’t so bad, though seeing as the class was already halfway through the semester, she feared she was a little behind. Once that was done and over with, she and Tomoyo walked together to lunch. They sat down with a group of Tomoyo’s friends, most of whom Sakura forgot the names of as soon as they were introduced.
Before long, the conversation turned (with lots of help from Tomoyo) to Sakura’s late mother.
“Isn’t it just terrible?” she asked the group, though she wore a large smile and a blush.
“I think I’d be knee-deep in depression!” one of Tomoyo’s friends answered.
“And if I wasn’t, I could always use it as a valid excuse to act depressed,” another replied with a sly grin. “I’m soo jealous of you, Sakura! You must have guys drooling all over you!”
She gave them a half-baked smile. Why was everyone so set on her being depressed? She guessed they’d realize soon enough that she wasn’t, but… was everyone in Forks like this? And she’d never noticed a correlation between hot guys and angsty girls before.
Tomoyo leaned over to whisper to Sakura, “I bet you’re wondering who they are, aren’t you?” She motioned with her eyes over to a table by the window, where only two people were sitting.
Sakura had to admit they were beautiful. And… completely alike. As in, they were identical twins. Both had windswept blonde hair, piercing blue eyes, and lanky figures.
“Actually, I wasn’t wondering that at all…”
“The one on the left talking to that red-head, that’s Yuui. Unfortunately, he’s already taken. And no, that’s not her.”
“Um, okay.” She wasn’t really sure why Tomoyo was so determined to tell all of this to her. Sure, those two twins were nice to look at, but Sakura wasn’t really interested in a relationship right now.
All of a sudden, Sakura noticed that Tomoyo’s constant talking had stopped buzzing in her ear. She turned away from the twins, confused to see Tomoyo back to eating her lunch silently.
Her brow furrowed. What had just happened? She suppressed a “Hoe?”, something she’d been doing since entering high school. “Uh, Tomoyo?”
“Hmm?” she asked through a mouthful of rather disgusting looking school pizza. For the daughter of a corporate head, you’d think she wouldn’t eat something as dangerous as cafeteria food.
“You just stopped talking.”
“Oh. Well, I figured it must not have been very interesting. Plus, how could I stay away from the delicious meal those wonderful ladies prepared for us?” She slipped the last part in as one of the said “wonderful ladies” traipsed by.
Ha-ha. How very tricky. Insert a tid-bit of information, then stop suddenly, leaving the poor listener somewhat interested in whatever wasn’t said. Problem is… it worked. It seemed she was going to have to ask it.
“Who’s he?” Sakura pointed to the other twin. He was watching Yuui with a strange expression; perhaps rueful? His mouth was set in a smile, but it didn’t reach his eyes, which were nearly concealed behind blonde bangs.
Tomoyo didn’t even try to hide the smile playing on her lips. Sakura had obviously said the magic words. She dropped the pizza slice onto her paper tray and stared meaningfully at Sakura. The effect was pretty dramatic. “That is Fai D. Flourite.”
A/N: Well, I hope you enjoyed it! You can find this story and subscribe/favorite it (if you want to keep up-to-date) on fanfiction.net My username on there is Kiana-Ishido and the title's the same: "For Lack of Twilight Parodies. "Thank you for reading, and please tell me what you think about it so far biggrin
