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Nigel went to Toronto today, and I felt so... empty. I think it's because he told me that, after he graduates from College, he wants to move out there, and break off all ties of his "old life" because he's sick and tired of having to constantly think of how his actions might effect those close to him.

I know this won't happen for another 6 or 7 years, but... I love him a lot, and maybe my anxiety kicks in whenever I think of him leaving. Because when I do that, I put myself in that time frame.

Also, at Grandma's today, I was watching Nana (it's pretty good!), and episode 13, I believe, her boyfriend wanted to have a talk with her after work, and, I'm assuming they broke up. Because Nana's (the more girly Nana) voice said "If Nana weren't there that night, I would've thrown myself into the river..."

Then I burst into tears. I'm afraid of losing him, but there's nothing going on right now that would even barely reflect losing him. Any advice?