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Lets just...start from the top?
We have been cutting hours at work. So many so, that this week I got one hour (that is the number right after zero). Want to know that I got last week? Two hours. That is 3 hours on a pay check. That means that in two weeks I will make $24. Oh, wait...I have to take out taxes, my bad. I'll have made $15 give or take stare
So that means I have been looking for another job. To bad I am competing in a market that is taking a nose dive. People are cutting hours everywhere. I have to compete with all the people that have been let go, the people that are leaving for better pay, are just out of HS and those who just want a summer job.
Lets see...oh, I have $300 worth of bills I need to pay. Fancy that.
I can't go to school this summer because I can't afford it (even with the student loan) and still go in the fall. Looks like I am a term behind now.
I failed one of my classes so my A.P just got a little harder to get out of.
I had a massive computer fail so I had to wipe the whole thing clean. I saved all my files which is great, but I no longer have word, Gimpi, powerpoint, or any of my games or art programs.
I no longer have any of my internet bookmarks.
We are getting ready for my Sister's graduation so everything is going fast pace. Nothing is clean enough for my mother and when ever I try to help I get yelled at. What can I say? I just can't do anything right. Though it feels great to do something without being asked to and then get yelled at because she doesn't like it and has to take the time to "fix your mistakes" on top of everything. Boy, I love that positive reinforcement.
I think thats a great starter to the hell I have been living in. I don't even want to consider what my birthday is going to be. I already got into an argument with Mom and sis. My birthday is a week after graduation. Mom was complaining, yet again, how she doesn't have money for anything because of the graduation. Well, I did the dumb thing and told her not to do all the big special things she does for my birthday. Save the money and just take me to dinner. Well, that set her off. Apparently, I was just trying to make her feel guilty about the whole thing. Right, thats what it was. I wanted you to feel guilty that I didn't want you to spend money on something I don't want. Yeah, I'm just so inconsiderate.
I also got into several arguments with several friends (internet and real). One of which kicked me out of her guild over it. I'm waiting for the other shoe to fall, I know it will, I haven't been so lucky this week.
Someone just....never mind. No pity or anything. Its just one of those times I feel really insecure about myself. I'll be ok after June.
Please, just hang in there with me. If I snap at you needlessly or act a little off, please forgive me. I have hit my breaking point is all.
Though, be advised, when I get super stressed I tend to snap at those that I feel need it. I have no censor and will let you know how I feel about any situation even if it hurts you. I try to filter myself online as I can be far to blunt. When I get stretched to thin the filter gets a little thin and a little short.
I still love you and I will forget the whole matter in a few days (I don't like keeping grudges). I let things slide like water over a duck so please try to do the same. Just like with my reviews, my comments to you if I snap need to be taken with a grain of salt. I am but one opinion in a situation.
Thats all I guess. I feel a little better but I hold a full opinion until the end of June.
cherub_Shagami · Tue May 25, 2010 @ 01:37am · 0 Comments |
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