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i donno what it is, i constantly think of him, no matter what i do he's always there in my thoughts; in my heart. I feel butterflies in the pit of my digestion every moment i speak with him or even just think of his sweet quirks and how caring he has become for me. i remember when it all started i was constantly pondering ' will this be like last time? where i started off as just a sick game to them? and then they began to love me for my simple ways and my hyperactive apparently mouse like quirks?' but as time went on i began to realize, i was basing what could happen, on what happened in the last relationship i had, I guess it was fear of being hurt that made me feel such a way. Kida, is not like anyone else, he's so sweet and kind, he would through anything away for me.. just for the sake of my happiness... for the sake of forever. I feel i have little to offer him in return, i offer my love of course but he already has it and will always have it. I just keep shuddering with joy at the very thought of actually being able to meet him in that crowded mall... the joy is so overwhelming i want to burst, i feel as though i would cling to him and never let go, while giggling through streaming eyes. He's had so many traumas as have i and i feel like maybe we can erase all the pain from one another's lives, i want to see his toothy smile and here him whisper to me softly in my ear, "i love you." Call me a romantic but i really, honest and truely, want to spend the rest of my life with him. I know in my heart that he will always love me and always be there, he has yet to misuse the trust i give him and even if he did i'm sure i'd be fast to forgive him, he's one of the most honest men i have ever loved. I guess for now i'm stuck only imagining it...at least i know that one day soon we will share in, sorry for how sentimental or dumb it sounds, true loves kiss.
Ugh i just cant get him out of my head, even after he told me he thought i was allot like a mouse! thanks to him i keep doodling him as a feisty feline and myself as a teasing and clever rodent...hehe i guess its to be expected? after all i unlawfully tease him when i shouldn't... i even have moments where i end up apologizing for doing so, but he never believes me hehehe, he just calls me pure evil.

Love you always kida~ heart

Evan j Deubert