I will smile a fake smile, just for you..
I...dont see a point in life anymore..
Everyone i love..is leaving me, and everyone else..just seems to be fading away..
Some..think they are worthless...
..Im all alone usually..just..thinking.. Thinking about what to do with my life..
What to do with the future...
And whats beyond our world...
What i want to do with my life:
...if i stay alive.. Maybe..go into animation, become a therapist, or maybe even a writer... not sure..
Future... I...dont know. Move far away..Because i hate where i live..
Whats beyond our world...
Im going agnostic..
Because...Who can really know whats beyond, if everyone who dies, we can not talk to? ...
Its...So complicated..
...
Sometimes..I just want to kill myself..just to find out...
But..most religions say if you kill yourself, you go to hell..burn for eternity... im sorry...I would rather do something else with my life..
Heaven..I dont want to go to...
...So whats left for me?
..The spirit world?
Watching people go on everyday..when they are alive..what i could have kept my life..and changed things..
..it would just hurt..
Maybe reincarnation does happen... Maybe i've already lived..maybe...I dont know... I just...Dont know....
Im so confused...
Kill me now...
~Tamara...~
Maybe you will actually believe it..
