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I understand why those who go under mental instability end up in a white room of an asylum..

Am I already in one?

I sit in my room, majority of the day with the thoughts in my mind twisting and turning, still inverting me slowly with regret and disappointment. Fear. Wondering when this life can finally end for me. This forsaken room.. This damned house...

I can't wait 'till I'm set free. All I want is to sleep...
Oh God.. To sleep. Sleep forever...


What use is a soul that will later on in life, die?
What use is a soul who was not meant to be here?
What use is a soul who is not needed for long?

I'm only mere sacrifice for the one's in need.
So why should I be here?

These questions.. all of which I already know the answer to...
But why me? That concept, something I cannot fathom.

Of late, I haven't been able to sleep right...
Oh God, how I wish to sleep..
Forever.

An impure and tainted being with a soul of a majesty, of which to be sacrificed. Why must I be so darkened? Black... All I'd ever wanted to have was a sense of purity. That of light... White...

But no... What I have and what I cannot be, can only bring me to tears, the color of the turquoise sky in the Mourn.

How I wish my beloved Death would come for me.
Death... Death.. Could I ever love anyone more than that of Death? Who knows... I want to... But why bother if in every time, I'm to be left alone by whom I give and dedicate my life to...
I don't want broken promises... ever again.

I want Death.
For he could promise me and never break his oath.
Promise me my yearning for sleep...
And to bring a white rose, that of represents the purity I longed for..
On my grave.