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Journal of your (everyday?) girl What ever is on my mind. Is it on yours too?


PridefulWiccan
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My Grandmother Found Out!!

Okay topic of the day... well considering the time on my end it is more like morning but anyways! A few days ago it was offically confirmed that someone told my Grandmother that I'm pagan. Yikes! I've been severly depressed about it because of the way I found this one. I was discussing my renting a house from my Grandmother when my Grandfather asked me if I would be having any parties. I laughed and said I only had a few friends so probably not (this question was due to the fact that my party crazy sister and cousin were the last renters). Anyways my Grandfather's exact next words were "Well what about that satan worshiping stuff you are into now, I heard those people have some wild parties". Oh ********! were my first thoughts. So then I had to explain to them that I didn't worship satan and it all went down hill from there.

Anyways. My point is that I get told atleast once a week that I'm going to hell, which I don't care. Heck I've gotten used to my mother acting like my religion is a joke, but something about the thought of my grandmother praying for my immortal soul really bugs me you know? sad

And I don't know what to do!! I mean if I talk to her verablly I'll probably do what I always do when explaining my religion!! I have a terrible memory so alot of times I mix or mess things up! Heck I have to read about a holiday everyday a month prior just to get it right! Plus if my grandmother every verablly tells me that she is worried I'll go to hell then I would have to tell her I don't believe in satan or hell and then she will want me to explain why and then yeah... that in it's sell will cause an arguement!!

Then I'm scared if I give her a book she won't read it. Plus if she actually knows about my religion she will only have a better way to lecture me! But at the same time I don't want her to believe all the common misconceptions about wicca! And I know no matter what she won't accept me and here is why. Anyone who has read my prof knows that I grew up Mormon... MY WHOLE FAMILY IS MORMON!! And anyone who knows Mormon's knows that they are stubborn as ********!! My Grandmother will not give up till I am Mormon again!! To her the only real religion is Mormonism and unless I am Mormon I'm never going to make it to the Celestial kingdom which will always upset her!

I wish I could just tell her what I always tell my mother...

"Mom for now I believe in the God and Goddess and you believe in God and Jesus we will know who was right when we're dead!! It's either gonna be you walk toward the light and see a pregnant woman and a man with antlers or I'm going to walk toward the light and see a Hippie!! We'll know when we die can you drop it now?"

But unfortunatly this is not going to work with a 63 year old woman who is as dedicated to her religion as House is to being an a*****e to patients!

Why can't people just leave business that is not there's to the people the business belongs to? I didn't tell my grandmother for a reason!!! I wanted to explain it to her in a way that she could not have time to process all the lies!!! Now I'm stuck with a whole family that is going to never accept me for who I am with my religion!!!! GAH@!!!!




 
 
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