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I feel cornered. My old man represents the nothingness that's in my way. But with that saying, that's contradiction. How can there be something in the way when there's nothing. Well it's because more on the psychological side. Or am I using the wrong word. Whatever... The man never encourages me, he knows nothing of me, he never understands anything, and most of all I believe he doesn't love me anymore... He's nothing but dust in the wind. Everyday, I suffer from even just looking at him. He resembles my hatred.

Always wanting to kill myself... But, I never could, not even harm myself. So everyday I suffer, a fate absolutely worser than death itself. With death it just ends. But I forever am to bound to my life, always bearing the pain. I wonder even why I even exist. Do I even serve a purpose. It even pains me just typing this up and having to think about it.

I am just slowly rotting and there is nothing that I can do.

I ju- I just... don't know anymore. I wish it could just go away. The pain, it hurts to much.