I'll write whats on my mind I guess...
If I told you I wanted to be with you for the rest of my life and I wanted you to forever be mine thats the truth...
When I'm alone guess who's on my mind?
When I'm having fun guess who is in my thoughts?
When I'm stressed and busy to the point were my mind wants to explode guess who pops in my head and makes me smile?
When I'm focused on something really important guess who invades my mind?
I'm always thinking about you
are you ok?
where are you?
what are you up to?
how are you?
do you need anything?
is there anything I can do for you?
what if somethings happened to you?
what if you get hurt?
what if I'm not there for you?
Are you ever thinking of me?
What are you thinking?
And I think again... why am I thinking like this? I sound obsessive... but thats how I feel...
And I want to spend every minute with you and be by your side always... just to always be there for you...
And to be in your company means so much... you don't have to say a thing and the minutes I spend with you are worth so much more than I could have thought with any person...
And I have a hard time looking in your eyes because when I do it makes me think of how much I like you and get lost in my thoughts and how I've become accustomed to your looks and your voice and the words you say and how everything about you makes me feel happy...
And physically...
I don't have to like the way you look for me to love you...
I don't have to like the way you dress to love you...
I don't have to like your voice...
and I don't have to like the way you move to love you...
If I had known you this long and never seen your face before I would love you... but only if you were you... if that makes sense...
But mentally I love you... your words are like magic to me... and mean a lot more to me then words are supposed too...
And I love you physically... you just happen to be perfect the way you are... but you didn't have to be... It wouldnt matter to me...
And I wouldn't change you ever... I wouldn't try to make you change... because if I did... then I'd love you for all the wrong reasons...
And some other things I probably don't need to tell you... but when you call my name... it makes me shiver... and when you touch me... it does the same thing... and it feels so weird....
So in summary I love you for you and I want to spend all my time with you... and I always think about you and I care for you a lot more then is probably needed ^^` but I can't help it... and saying how I feel makes me feel awkward because I say so much but you don't... and I get embarrassed because I'm full of these feelings and words and I write them out and share them with you but I'm still not sure exactly what you think of me...
But I feel safe and insecure at the same time but I do love you... it whatever sense love is...
And maybe thats just how it works... I don't know anything about this... and I'm just following my blindfolded heart... but just so you know.... its not good at games like pin the tail on the donkey... I think its causing some internal bleeding even...
But I think thats what love is... at least thats how I feel... so I'm not sure what I'm saying... but its whats in my heart and brain... and even if it doesnt make sense... hopefully it makes enough to get my point across... I try...
And it helps if I write directly... and not say 'someone'... I can't write a little better if I write it like I'd say it... its a bad habit... -.- or is it?
Well.... hopefully that makes some sense... and hopefully I wrote it write so I don't offend anyone in some way shape or form... because thats happened... and I was embarrassed... oh and who knows how many typo's are in this... I don't have Microsoft word or anything... just notepad... and I'm using a different computer so I don't have Mozilla... which has a spell check... umm why do I keep writing... I was done like 5 sentences ago... no one cares about these extra things I'm writing anyway...maybe I should shut up now........... oh yeah I had chinese food for dinner... *sick to stomach now* M'kay I think that just about sums it up.... Oh yeah! Happy Easter! And remember... like Santa... Jesus is watching you... only he's not fictional and completely useless... and fat... he's cooler than that... so be good....
Shuting up now... </3
Oh wait one more thing... I got a fortune cookie tonight...
*sigh* if I can't make myself happy... hopefully I can use myself to make someone else happy....
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