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Here's some scariness for you:

Carbonated water: This is nasty on it's own. I know from experience. Especially nasty when warm.

Oxygen enriched water: What the hell is this for, gold fish?

Flavored water: Pretty much Crystal Light that they added "weird stuff" to to take away the color.

Vitamin water: I have a alot of stuff against this.
It says on bottle: For best results stick it in the fridge.
Excuse me?! For "Best results?!" What results? By drinking it do I become a mutant if I leave it out? And "Stick it in the fridge"?! Come on! You can have a paragraph long of really long words in the ingredients list to list basiclly water in every way you can but you can't say REFRIDGERATE?! Oh, and on't even get me started on all the bad uhh, I guess you can say "jokes" on the bottle...