It's Not Over Yet...
Well, The Goth Girl I talked to, she turned me down...in a nice way though, and we are friends now and she said maybe she'll give me a chance when she gets to know me more. Anyways, Guess I should get to what's happening at home...It's nice that I may have a chance with the girl I like, but home life sucks.
My sister has been going off a lot, with her friends. So much she doesn't have time for me anymore. Life is starting to suck a lot more now even. It's like my life is taking a turn for the worst...Like a train that goes down the wrong track and runs into another and then blows up. I'm scared to think what will happen in these next few days. Sure, I have friends, but my sister is starting to grow more apart from me with each passing day and you know, I have a huge heart for her. I don't want her to be hurt, and I don't want her out of my life and it scares me that she's always off with people, people I don't even know. Maybe she'll start having time for me later, I don't know, I'll just have to wait and see.
Anyways, School was great today. I hanged out with that goth girl today, was nice, I really do like her, she has the personality of an angel...which is kinda contradictory to what I normally want to feel or the way she acts. She really is a great person though. I just realized it's been like...months upon months since I wrote the last entry to this journal too...Maybe because I've been spending so much time with her, not to mention I've had alot of stuff going on. Apart from her schools not TOO great. I failed most of my exams the last semester round and might fail school. Not that I'm worried too much, don't even know why I still bother. Guess I still have faith that someday I will make something of my self. The teachers are still fat bitches that just like to b***h at me all day. They take any bad thing that happened to them that day out on the Emo kid...Like I don't have emotions, like I don't have feelings, like I'll just absorb it all and not even care, like I'm some kind of ******** emotional sponge. It's harder than people think being Emo...People are scared to approach you because you're not "normal" and when they do approach you, you don't know what to say because you're scared of what they're thinking. Sometimes I feel like it's tougher to be Emo than it would for me to just change my entire outlook on life.
I guess I have been changing part of my outlook though. Mainly because of that one girl...She's the only person that's ever accepted me and we hang out a lot, I think I'm actually starting to grow on her...I may have a chance soon enough. I'm so happy things are finally starting to get a lil bit better...atleast at school...School is nice when I'm with her...When I'm not it sucks, and when I get home, even worse because noyone is there for me. Maybe me and Sard will begin dating and she'll come home someday's...Will make me feel alot less lonely and maybe I'll drop out of this dark pit of depression. Until next time, next time should be alot more cheerful.
(I have ways to end or continue this story...just a matter of what I, and the few readers, want me to do. Leave comments?)
