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Okay,first off I am not a satist or anything like that....I don't condone or promote satanic activity....i'm christian belive it or not....anyway uhhhh please comment on the structure of the poem and how it flows and is....not on the subject weather your christian or not.

The last poem I posted up someone said why don't you experiment and change up your style....so I decided to that for my follow up poem Dying Hopes 3.

Recentlly I was looking at some of my old demo poems that were'nt released on this account....I noticed that they were very dark....so i decided that I would go back to that style of writing for the time being...except I decided to push it even further to see what could come out of it....anyway please comment and post your thoughts on this poem.(Also sorry for any spelling and or punctuation errors made.)

Before I talk, I almost cried when it said one comment.

Now onto business.

The second ******** in the third stanza isn't neccessary.
You should delete it. =]
Flows better.

there's only one d in ending

That's all for that. =]

for me, the christian vs. non is tormenting.
so I decided to wait until I'm not here to figure myself out.

How come the entry right before this is private?
= [

And I've got like four poems to enter in my journal, I'll get to them when I've got the time

Hey Stef, thanks for the corrections also....Oh, and today well I was out today I finally came up with a better name than "Anti-Christianity" and here it is...beside's the title fit's the poem better.

Oh, and here's a hug heart heart heart My number one doesn't need to cry ^//^

You deleted the first ******** in the third stanza, not the second. ^_^

Silly.

and nice title. =]

=hugs back=

^////^

lol towards stef's comment XD

nice.

but yeah i like it... and yeah it is.. a bit different, but still good 3nodding

strange... is it just me or do u write better dark poems than bright.. (me to lol.. well use to, i starting to get better at bright poetry)

hmm... than again.. i haven't re-read u poems in a while... as far as i remember, they were all good lol just a lil bit flow problems lol but it was all good ^-^

good job chrissy~! blaugh

can't wait to read more!

LOL chris your so CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUTEEEEEEEEEEEEE for the way you said it here:

Note...Read Before Commenting.

Okay,first off I am not a satist or anything like that....I don't condone or promote satanic activity....i'm christian belive it or not....anyway uhhhh please comment on the structure of the poem and how it flows and is....not on the subject weather your christian or not.

The last poem I posted up someone said why don't you experiment and change up your style....so I decided to that for my follow up poem Dying Hopes 3.

Recentlly I was looking at some of my old demo poems that were'nt released on this account....I noticed that they were very dark....so i decided that I would go back to that style of writing for the time being...except I decided to push it even further to see what could come out of it....anyway please comment and post your thoughts on this poem.(Also sorry for any spelling and or punctuation errors made.)


Im glad your very honest guy, and i knew you were chirstian becuase i read your interested, lol, ignore the people, they might , it took it wrong becuase of your avi. But i know that your christian, which is awesome. Well your poem is nice a little scary what it says. buts is alright. To be honest with u. 3nodding