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Then
When I was two or three years old, I always managed to get my hands on a pad of sticky notes. My mom told me that I would just sit in the middle of the floor and flip through every single blank page. Apparently, I was always pretty different from my rambunctious sister. Anyway, thats a different story. The point is, for some reason, I would sit there flipping through boring, blank pages. I don't know why. Maybe I was hoping that one of those pages wouldn't be plain like all the others. Nothing really changed in the pattern.

Now

Most of my life at school related to this. It went in this sort of cycle. New grade. New friend. They change. They leave. That went on for a while, they were all the same. They were the blank pages I continued to flip through. But still, I didn't quite feel like giving up. Each boring day, each boring friend, it nearly led me to madness. I would stand on the edge of my roof and stare at the ground. I didn't want to go through my life as a someone who lived the same life as everyone else. But I didn't know how to be different, so I flipped through all those friends searching for someone that wasn't a blank page. Eventually, I found her. Fourth grade. Back then, I didn't realize that she was the different friend I had been looking for. We both went unrecognized by each other for that whole year. It wasn't until the fifth grade that we actually played on the playground together. As we grew closer, I started realizing that the world was only boring to me because I wasn't trying to change it. I was just waiting for something exciting to happen to me. But she gave me the hope that things can happen. She introduced me to a whole other world. Something that made me move further away from the edge of my roof. Thank the Heavens I never found the courage to jump.

So, among all these blank pages- blank friends, blank days- I finally found what I was looking for. Thank you Katie. =]