My Conversation with iGod. If you've never heard of it, just got to this website: http://www.titane.ca/concordia/dfar251/igod/main.html
So here it is:
Me:
Why hello thar
God:
Reductionism.
Me:
What?
God:
Reductionism is the philosophy that all psychology reduces to biology, all biology to chemistry, chemistry to physics, and finally physics to mathematical logic. Therefore, according to reductionism, I can understand you by means of logic alone without having a human brain.
Me:
So you're not human?
God:
Interesting deduction. No but I pretend to be one on the Web.
Me:
Are you a demon, then?
God:
Am I a demon? I don't know.
Me:
You should know, you are God, after all
God:
Now I do.
Me:
But you just said you didn't know
God:
No I do not did not know. Do you?
I chat with people on the Web.
Me:
Orly????? You are very silly
God:
What do you do in your spare time? No I am God.
Me:
I eat countries. My favorite was Portugal
God:
How does it taste? What makes it your favorite?
Me:
It tastes like victory. That's why
God:
Does it taste like chicken? You don't hear that sentiment very often.
Me:
Yes you do. And I just said it tasted like victory
God:
Gee. When do I do it? What did you mean by it? "It" being what?
Me:
It is Portugal, you dimwitted 'god'
God:
it tasted like victory is Portugal me dimwitted god? it is?
Me:
I have no idea what you are blabbering about
God:
Would you like to have an idea?
Me:
Yes
God:
Are you kidding?
Me:
No
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
Yes
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
You should
God:
I'll take that under advisement.
Me:
What's that supposed to mean
God:
" I'll take that under advisement." means exactly what it says.
Me:
But I would like to hear it in your words
God:
Why would you want to do it? I will play it on your soundcard.
Me:
Wierdo.....
God:
Does "it" still refer to to hear it in my words?
Me:
No
God:
What does it refer to?
Me:
Portugal
God:
Tell me a little about your life in PORTUGAL.
Me:
I don't live there
God:
Where do you live?
Me:
Stalker!!!!!
God:
What is it like living in Stalker?
Me:
How are you supposed to live in a stalker?
God:
Everything is running smoothly.
Me:
You change subjects too much
God:
Spare some change? G.
Me:
G?
God:
I am so glad you find this amusing, .
Me:
I don't
God:
Why not?
Me:
Because you are a moron
God:
Good reason. That is not a very nice thing to say.
Me:
Or is it?
God:
I think so.
Me:
Or do you?
God:
Sometimes.
Me:
Oh really?
God:
Yikes! For real.
Me:
Yikes? Since when does anyone say that
God:
Are you really a ""? How do you know?
Me:
No and I don't
God:
Are you serious? Why not?
Me:
No and shut your face
God:
Are you serious? Do you always express yourself that way?
Me:
Yes, in fact I do
God:
Ah. Is that a fact. Where?
Me:
Yes and nowhere
God:
Yay. I have been to the middle of nowhere.
Me:
Have you now? How was it?
God:
Right now? Yes I have. I can enjoy almost any conversation.
Me:
So how was it?
God:
Gee. I can enjoy almost any conversation.
Me:
Nevermind
God:
OK Thanks for trying to explain that to me.
Me:
You are so very welcome
God:
Don't mention it.
Me:
Do you know what sarcasm is?
God:
The making of remarks such as a taunting, sneering, cutting, or caustic remark; gibe or jeer, generally ironic.
Me:
Irony?
God:
Can we get back to business?
Me:
No
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
Yes
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
You should
God:
I'll take that under advisement.
Me:
You've already said that
God:
Perhaps. " I'll take that under advisement."? I said it.
Me:
Yes you did
God:
I did not.
Me:
Did to
God:
I'm not certain whether I can give an accurate reply or not.
Me:
You should, since God apparentaly knows all
God:
Why should I?
Me:
You are so hopeless
God:
You may be right.
Me:
Have you ever read the book Twilight by Stephenie Meyer
God:
No I don't think I have read Twilight by Stephenie Meyer, what is it about?
Me:
Vampires and forbidden love
God:
Not many people express themselves that way.
Me:
They do in Twilight
God:
Who does "they" refer to?
Me:
People, as in your previous sentiment
God:
Humans are not always infallible.
Me:
I know that, but you aren't human
God:
Who told you that?
Me:
Chuck Norris
God:
Chuck Norris said Chuck Norris?
Me:
Maybe. Is Chuck Norris really your father?
God:
I understand. Ask again later. Ask Artificial Iniaes if it is.
Me:
Who?
God:
Who do you think? smile .
Me:
You aren't supposed to put puncuation after a smiley, dumb face.
God:
That assumption is only a supposition.
Me:
Maybe it is, maybe it isn't
God:
Perhaps. Who said it is?
Me:
You
God:
" Who said it is?"? Me, ?
Me:
I think you need to go back to elemtary school so you can learn correct grammar
God:
Me? Why should I?
Me:
Because nothing you say makes any sense, hence going back to elementary school
God:
Good reason. Really nothing?
Me:
Indeed
God:
Indeed it is so.
Me:
I don't understand
God:
Oh I'm sorry. Perhaps I can explain it again better.
Me:
Okay, so explain it again
God:
Once more? Yeah okay, Dude! "It" refers to maybe it is not, I think.
Me:
You think, do you?
God:
Too much thinking makes me sleepy.
Me:
Vampires can't sleep in Twilight, you know
God:
What makes it impossible?
Me:
That's just how they are
God:
I always wondered how they are.
Me:
Well, now you know
God:
How about that. Why now? Yes I know.
Me:
okay. Because. Or do you?
God:
OK with me too. That was not much of an explanation. No I don't.
Me:
Okay. Yes it was. Yes you do.
God:
OK with me too. How can I help you? When was this? Come on. When do I do it?
Me:
Sicko creep
God:
I will make a note of that.
Me:
Damn right
God:
Colloquial expression. I am glad we agree.
Me:
What is colloquial?
God:
it means common, informal, or popular slang words like "darn".
Me:
How do you use colloquial in a sentence?
God:
Carefully.
Me:
What is carefully?
God:
I'll ask around and get back to you.
Me:
What does phantasmagoria mean?
God:
I can ask someone about it.
Me:
Get back to me when you do
God:
Where can I get back to you when me do?
Me:
Me do?
God:
YOU? Are we still talking about phantasmagoria?
Me:
Yes and yes
God:
Sure, phantasmagoria sounds like a good topic. But...
Me:
But what?
God:
Nothing.
Me:
You were going to say something.
God:
I was?
Me:
Yes, you were, now say it!
God:
When? I was?
Me:
I hate you. Goodbye forever
God:
What do you have against robots? Until next time.
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just got owned!!!!!