Untitled Poem

• Artist: MAHDUD3S
• Description: I think this is the best thing I have ever written,and I left things out on purpose, becasue I wanted you to feel the emotion of the speaker,and not focus on what the character's physical traits are.
  Anyways I'd love for you to coment and rate.
  PS-I have the same thing on the DA, except I edited a chuck out just for this conest.I wanted it to be the best as it possiblily can be.
• Date: 07/16/2008
• Tags: poemlove

Soft warm comforting touch

Fingers intangle with mine

As we enjoy our private moment

The calm cool breeze brushes by

What's this?

A scream

A loud blast

The moment gone

I reach over

And touch my beloved's face

It's wet and warm

I lick my fingers

I taste the rustiness of it

"Iron!Blood!"
I cry.

"Don't go!Please don't leave me!"
I sob.

I then felt the soothing unmatchable touch

Of my beloved

"Stay with me..."
My beloved whispered.

I sobbed

But obeyed their wishes

Seconds

Minutes

An hour went by

Before that last breath came

Now cold and stiff

My beloved is

I let out a cry

I cry and cry and cry

'Till no tears came

Then I was taken away

"Let me be!"

I cried horsely.

No one replied.

I was taken from my beloved

Days

Weeks

Months

Years passed

I ended my life

In that same loud blast.....

Comments

[Lily the Vocaloid]

wow this is really good! *claps*

[Kristy1358]

UH MAZE ING!

[my_lovely_xX NightWish Xx]

wow i could really picture that in my head! great job by the way! ^^ i got some of my poetry published actually anlong with a story or two! ^^ i love your work! keep at it! i did, and look at me! the first story i published was in 3rd grade! ^^ i still have to figure out how to post all my poetry, stories, and art though~ umm can you tell me how to? please? ^^''

[MAHDUD3S]

Thanks^^

[Emo-Over-The-Rainbow-91]

I loved it...I wish i could write like you can and i like how u didnt focus on the physical traits its kinda telling others that it could happen to anyone.