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stressed
dear dyllan,
its not like we dated for verry long, and i know we didnt make the best coupple ever, and i know we had quite a few vproblems, you being 19 goin on 20 and me being 16 goin on 17, you living a hour away, you having two jobs , me still being in high school, but we were both happy,... is that what matterd? we had it a little rough in the end, we wer eboth overly stressed, your friends wanted you to dump me, my friends hate you, but i dont give a dam what others say! its my life and all do dam well what i want with it no regards to any one elses oppingion! any howw, that day, that terribly stupid day! it wasnt me texting you dyllan, it was jessie, she wanted us to brake up so bad, so she mad it hapen, it want me texting you,.. i would never say what she said to you.. i wanted to tell you so bad it wasnt me! but i knew you wouldnt listin to me, so i wated three weeks, isnt that what you wanted any how? space? well i gave you that. and now you said that your compleetly over us. what? how can you be compl;eetly over this? what we have been through? what weve done? is that even possible? no. its not. because now you know it wasnt me. when we talked today, you said that it changes evrything . you still have feelings for me. you still love parts of me that you wish you didnt. you want ot be friends, but we cant be friends can we... we cant fight agenst the emotions we still share for echother, i cant beleave you said things you did.. we didnt even talk about us for the longest time, just you being totaly random, i was so acword, sorry you make me so nervious... but anny how! after you said we cant be friends ... i broke down i couldnt help it any more.. the tought of never talking to you or seeing you again broke my heart more then it allready was! just rembering it makes me tear up again.. yoyu got out of the care, so did i, and you huged me.. that when the tears and the sobbing really started.. i got the sweetshirt i bought you all tear staind..but you just keeped holding me untll i pulled away and stared at the ground.. looked at you and a tear fell, and you huged me again.. and this time i hugged you back.. now im crying again just remembering it! gezz.. you were going to be so late to work! so.. i had to leave .. so i walked away sobbing.. you looked so sad.. i cant decide if i feel worse rigfht now then i did thoughs three weeks or now! all i wanted you to say is that it was over. compleetly over and you had no felings for me any more. not be so dam nice !i dont want to have theis feelings any longer dyllan! i just want to not have this any more! you coulda broke me sayin that you didnt care, but thats soo much better then giving me hope.. its horrible because now i have somthing to hold onto and i wish you squished it! but noo.. you were soo nice.. maede me still love you .. love...America crying
 Eyeless-Milo · Fri May 11, 2012 @ 03:05am · 0 Comments |
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