Dear Freakin Diary,
I just got a memory foam mattress. When I sat on it, I wasn't expecting it to be so squishy. I thought I was gonna be sucked into an evil vortex in the demon mattress world and the evil mattress boogie creep will feast happily off my tender flesh but luckily tht didn't happen. That thing is so comfortable it's like sleeping on cats! I fell asleep in like 2 seconds and slept like a freakin log! But now my bed is soooo much thicker. I have trouble climbing up on my bed. I had to pole vault just to get high enough to see over my bed. At least by the time i'm up there, I exhasted from all that climbing. Well Idiot, I thought I'd just let you know so you can envy me. Bye Stupid.
Love,
M@r$ scream
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I'm an alligator, I'm a mama-papa coming for you
I'm the space invader, I'll be a rock 'n' rollin' b***h for you.
Keep your mouth shut;
You're squawking like a pink monkey bird
And I'm busting up my brains for the words.
†