-sigh- it's the third day of summer and while everyone else is out swimming, partying, hanging with friends, going somewhere, sleeping late as hell, waking up after lunch...i'm stuck inside the house studying and doing crap. it sucks so much, it's not even funny.
again, it makes anyone want to kill themselves. and every day, i only get like 1 hour of free time. wtf
i think i AM gonna kill myself. i hate this s**t. he expects so much and yet gives so little. b***h.
-sigh-
and to add on to that, i have no idea when cross country starts. cross country might just be one way to get some social...and plus i have to keep up with the ASB meeting to get the registration to go to riverside for ASB later in the summer.
cross country=my life. and if he takes cross country away from me, i am seriously gonna kill myself. not even kidding anymore.
and to add on MORE, i noticed i've become even more depressed and quieter than usual. ah, whatever. they'll never notice. i mean, what's another scar, right? they didn't even notice the recent one. psh, bastards.
i am lacking social aspect. and because of that, i'm dying emotionally.
i am forced to study for 4 hours of math per day and 2.5 hours of reading. and because of that, i'm dying mentally
i am forced to work out and get up at 6:45 every morning to go swimming and work out 3 hours per day in the hot weather. and because of that, i'm dying physically.
it can't get worse than that, you know.
but physically doesn't matter. "My babies" are popping up anyways. who cares.
heart
私はこれが停止しなければ自分自身をすぐに殺そうと思っている
私は両方をそんなに逃す、私はそれらについて考えることを止め、ひとつひとつの時間叫ぶことができない heart
P.S. and when i say "my babies", i mean my scars. heart
 xslvrnitesx · Sat Jun 16, 2007 @ 06:09am · 0 Comments |
