Death, a haiku and free verse

• Artist: Radioactive Corruption
• Description: Felt like writing about it. We can't adept to death, it is our nature.
• Date: 05/03/2010
• Tags: death haiku free verse

Death

The morning glory
Fades beneath the bloody clouds
The Burdens arise.

Death free verse

The man woke up in the pitiful black night.
Not knowing what was out there he walked out of the little village hut he lived in.
He noticed the red] lightning and soon it struck 10 feet away from him.
Black fog arrived to cover up this mess.
He hides behind a pile of logs peeking at what the thing is.
He noticed a skeleton with a shroud and dressed in all black.
Behind him he sees a blade, poison dripped at the very tip.
Plop, plop, plop.
The man then accidently hits a log and rolls out and makes the pile fall.
The skeleton slowly turns his skull and only his skull 90 degrees to where he is.
The man stares in a gaze into the skeletons blank empty holes in his eyes.
Soon he realizes he fell for the trap and screams in agony as this merciless creature comes slowly and steadily toward him.
The skeleton 1 inch away head to head breathes but he cant.
The clouds clear out suddenly and the skeleton screams.
The man woke up sweating and decided to take a walk since it was only a dream.
Little did he know he was given a second chance....

The man takes aspirin.
It dissolves in his sleep.
Muttering and cursing for he is old.
Everyone knows it his time.

Comments

[Elyse N Wonder]

I thought it was quite well, expecilly the free verse wink .

[mikiransue]

Good job. its very detailed. you should get it published! it would be a big hit! :3

[Morbid Humour]

I love the formatting and word choice~!
There is some fantastic imagery in here as well, if I do say so myself. ^^

[REBELIOUS-SOULJAH]

really good. i loved the haiku personally. but you went a little to detailed for me in the free verse.

[Hope_Kagome]

really good poem, i had chills(:

[Radioactive Corruption]

I meant for the free verse that if u have a second chance at death then u better use it well. You got one shot at this world otherwise ur dead.

[Ms Thelma]

I like the haiku, but the freeverse was strange to me. It doesn't really flow very well, imo. I mean, I know free verse isn't structured, but they still flow similarly to a poem, which I don't see in this. 4'd for the haiku, but not the free verse.