• “Damn it Matt! This thing is impossible!” Mello said shaking the controller furiously in the redhead’s face.

    “No it’s not. You just have to concentrate. All you do is jab random buttons,” Matt laughed.

    “It seems to work for you,” the chocoholic shrugged.

    “No it doesn’t. Here, let me help you.” Matt moved closer to the irate blonde, swinging an arm over his shoulder so his hands could rest on top of the gunman’s. Slowly the redhead led him through the game, his fingers guiding the blonde to the right buttons. As Mello got the hang of the game he settled back into the gamer’s arms. At the same time Matt moved forward to get a better grasp of the controller. Their speed gradually increased along with their intensity and soon Mello was screaming at his on screen persona. Matt laughed at the sight of Mr. Badass himself getting so riled up over a simple videogame.

    His laughter was cutoff when a lock of blonde hair brushed against his face. His fingers froze on the buttons. He hadn’t realized how close they were.

    “Matt! Matt, what are you doing? That guy’s gonna get us. Hey. Hey!” Mello managed to wrestle the controller out of his death grip and pause the game. “Hey, are you alright?” He turned to face the redhead, putting some space between them. This seemed to help unfreeze the gamer. He nodded his head slowly before shaking it vigorously from side to side. The blonde leaned forward in concern. “What is it?”

    Matt struggled for words to describe how he was feeling but failed in his attempts. There were no words to explain how mixed up he felt inside.

    “Actions speak louder than words,” he muttered under his breath. He squeezed his eyes shut tight before closing the small space between them, pressing their lips together. Mello’s eyes widened in shock. He pulled away with his hand gently pushing Matt away.

    “I’m- I’m so sorry. I- I can’t. I just can’t,” the blonde stuttered out. He stared down at his hands morosely, afraid that his reaction had hurt his best friend.

    “Is it- is it the Catholic thing? ‘Cause if it is I totally understand.” The ferocity in Mello’s eyes when he looked up scared Matt a little bit.

    “Believe me, Catholicism is the last thing that is keeping me from sleeping with you here and now.”

    “What do you mean?” The redhead scratched his head in confusion.

    “I haven’t been a Catholic in a very long time.” Mello’s mournful tone broke Matt’s heart.

    “What happened? You were the most devout person I’ve ever met. You punched me in the nose once because I said I didn’t believe in God. What changed?” The blonde looked away to stare blankly at the figures frozen on the TV screen.

    “There are some things in this world that no god would ever allow.”

    --

    Mello stumbled up to the large doors and out of the rain that reminded him so much of the night that he left Whammy’s just a few years ago. Different place, same rain. Same situation, he thought sourly. He had lost another crummy job and had been kicked out of another cheap apartment, leaving him in the same situation he had been in when he ran away from Whammy’s; homeless. As he had back then, he turned to the same last resort.

    He pushed the heavy wooden doors open and slipped inside. He shook out his wet blonde hair like a dog, splattering the cold stone with water. He walked down the rows of pews and slid into a seat near the altar. He knelt down and lost himself in the rhythm of a familiar prayer.

    “Hail Mary, full of grace

    The Lord is with thee.

    Blessed art thou amongst women,

    And blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.

    Holy Mary,

    Mother of God,

    Pray for us sinners,

    Now and at the hour of our death.

    Amen.”

    “Well what have we here? You’re no church mouse,” a soft voice said from beside him. Mello’s head snapped up, his eyes flying open.

    “No, Father,” he sighed realizing that there was no immediate threat. He sized up the man standing at the end of his pew. He wore the usual garb of a priest but that was to be expected. He was only a little taller than Mello would have been if he was standing. He was a good bit rounder than the blonde boy, though. What little hair he had left on the top of his head was graying and was even white in a few places. He didn’t seem too dangerous.

    “Let me guess. Ran away from home, did you?” His voice was warm and just hearing it began to melt away some of Mello’s mental defenses.

    “I’m more of the recently-evicted-with-nowhere-to-turn variety,” the blonde said a little shyly.

    “Evicted?” The priest’s kind eyes widened a little in surprise. “You look barely old enough to be out on your own. And even that’s a stretch.”

    “I’ve been alone for longer than you would believe, Father.” The strength in his eyes convinced the old priest of that.

    “I believe you my son.” He placed a large hand on top of the boy’s head. It was warm like his voice and oddly comforting. “You are always welcome in God’s house. There is an empty bed that you can use back in the parsonage.” The barest hint of a smile showed on Mello’s lips at the thought of an actual bed to sleep in. He had planned on just crashing on a pew and the idea of an actual bed was almost unfathomable.

    “Thank you, Father.”

    --

    Matt’s forehead wrinkled in confusion. “I don’t understand. If you’re not Catholic, then why do you still wear that rosary?” He looked deep into those broken blue eyes and glimpsed at the answer.

    --

    “Our Father, who art in Heaven,

    Hallowed be thy Name;

    Thy kingdom come;

    Thy will be done.

    On earth as it is in Heaven.

    Give us this day our daily bread;

    And forgive us our trespasses,

    As we forgive those who trespass against us;

    And lead us not into temptation,

    But deliver us from evi-” A heavy hand clamped down over his mouth, silencing his prayers.

    “Not even God can hear you now,” the dark hulk above him said. The blonde bit back tears as the shadow drove his point home, thrusting into him heavily. He yelled out in pain. “God may not be able to hear you but I can. Sing for me my pretty little blonde,” the obscurity laughed pulling his hand away. Bile rose in Mello’s throat and he was determined not to give this monster the satisfaction of his screams. But as he thrust harder and faster he couldn’t keep his cries to himself.

    The blonde hiccupped slightly as a single tears slid down his pale cheek. It was amazing how quickly things changed. The same hands that had seemed so warm and welcoming were now heavy and oppressive as they pinned him down. The eyes that had seemed so kind were now vacant and lustful. The voice that had seemed so comforting was now cruel and demanding. And the bed that had seemed so promising was now hell itself.

    --

    Mello fingered the cool beads that hung around his neck and actually laughed. A short, sharp, bitter laugh that cut through Matt and gave him a taste of the venom that was running through his best friend. The gunman’s grip on the necklace tightened.

    “I wear this rosary to remind me of what I’ve lost.”