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The Loona Rose
Chapter 1 Green Eyes
It was just the beginning of the day and I was waking up from a deep slumber. I got up and looked out my window to see the sun just coming up. The light burned my eyes a little trying to a gusted to it. After they a gusted I went to the mirror. My name is Loona and I am “5,6” and a half with blond hair and a little bit of brown in it. My mom, Solar, said that I have sandy blond hair, but I say its just blond. I have two different color eyes, one green and the other blue. People say that I’m to skinny, but I think I’m fine. I have a twin brother, his name is Eclipse, he looks just like me, but both his eyes are blue. We are sixteen years old, people think just because we are twins we have to like the same things, NOT! I like drama and the arts. He likes video games.
It was the first day of school and I was not looking forward to it, because that means homework. Well at lest I get to see my friends. My best friend’s name is Raven and she is into the same things I am, but she is “4,3” and a little chunky. She has brown eyes and very pail skin. So I start to get dressed for the day. I put on the usual black on black outfit for the first day. Then I went to the kitchen to eat breakfast when I was Eclipse at the table eating Captain Marshmallow.
“Hay Loona are u exited for school to day?” He said it sarcastically.
“Yes I am I can’t what to get the first pack of homework!”
He rolled his eyes at me and I started to laugh. “You know we don’t get homework on the first day of school.” Now he was glaring at me.
1
“True but still it just means that its getting closer.” Then he started to laugh.
“Well lets get going.” He got up and grad his bag. Then walked out the door.
When we got to school I started to look for Raven, but she found me thou. We started to scream when Mrs. Jackson walked by. So as always she told us to be quite, but we just made our volume a little lower. So we glared at her and then looked at each other.
“I am so happy it’s the first day of school lol. So I can hang out with you again Loona.”
“Ya I missed you to. Its time to get our schedules huh?”
“Ya I guess it is.”
So we went to get our classes organized and went to class. We have first period together, but it was with Mrs. Jackson. So we couldn’t sit together. Then second period came around and we had to say goodbye for now. I had Miss. Clark next so I went to class and sat in the back of the room. Then the late bell rang and Miss. Clark started with today’s lesson, but I didn’t pay any attention.
Then a boy walked in to the class and went start to the teacher. He handed the teacher a note.
“Sorry I’m late.” He had a sarcastic tone in his voice. He had spiky red hair (it looked like it was on fire.) When Mrs. Clark told him to sit down. He looked around the room at the same time I did, but I can only see one empty seat. It was the one next to me. He started to walk down the hall of decks and chars when I saw his eyes. They where green but not a normal green they where almost yellow. He sat next to me and said hi my name is Blaze Tompson. I couldn’t respond I was to busy looking into his eyes. He stared at me for a moment, but after a while I think he realized that I was staring at his eyes.
“You know your eyes are the windows to your soul.”
Then the bell rang and I jumped. He started to laugh.
2
“Your funny you know.” Then he got up and walked away. I couldn’t help but stare as he did so. Then Raven ran in to meet me. She gave me a strange look. I shook my head to get out of the trance that I was in.
“Why are you looking at me like that?”
“Are you feeling OK?”
“Ya. Why do you ask?”
“Well you look a little sick.”
I started to think to my self until Raven interrupted me
- by TheLastDarkHeartedAngel |
- Fiction
- | Submitted on 02/15/2009 |
- Skip
- Title: The Loona Rose
- Artist: TheLastDarkHeartedAngel
- Description: A book that im writing hope u like it. there will be mistakes and i hope u can over see them but if it bugs u please tell me so i can fix then in the future.
- Date: 02/15/2009
- Tags: loona rose
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Comments (4 Comments)
- flammarumlea - 03/26/2009
- It is a good start to a story. I suggest having someone else read it before you post any more of it (it makes it easier to read without the errors)
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- DramaDork372 - 03/12/2009
- Hey good job i think it will be good. you guys, it IS a rough draft and it is supposed to have mistakes. Thats what editors are for. so dont criticize people for stupid stuff like spelling errors
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- mysticrydder - 03/03/2009
- work on your spelling please. a gusted is adjusted. thou is though. and so on. Also, Loona is spelt Luna. but its a name and you can spell however you want.
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- -Deathly Destruction- - 02/24/2009
- A new line (enter x2) should be started every time a new character speaks, otherwise it just becomes a blinding block of text that discourages readers. There is also no period after the word 'Miss' as "Miss" is not an abbreviation but a whole word. The abbreviation of 'miss' is "Ms.". Watch out for your phrasing and placement of where, or where not, to put commas. Otherwise, good start. smile
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