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"Do you fear what is to become of what you loved? Or fear what is to become of the cities full of innocence caved in by the sins of a modern world? Are you afraid that you cannot save those you care for? You've shunned them all why does it matter? Remember this Nathaniel there is a Devil and he will rule even if you do interfere......So what are you waiting for? Pick a side Nathaniel, the wars just begun"........
I awake with a start searching for what could be the source of this evil voice. Every night it becomes clearer as if walking towards me in a dark corridor. But every time i look every time i awake its all the same no one stands near me Im alone. This constant paranoia that is taking a hold of my mind closing it to all but my own breathing and my heart straining itself to pump blood to my numb finger tips and toes.
I cannot sleep the voice haunts me quickly turning my dreams into nightmares. I quickly change into my faded blue jeans as to not wake up mother. God knows her wrath although she has a point can be a little overdrawn. She fears what i have become after fathers death full of anger and hate. Listening to what she says is the "evils music" metal ,rock,hard rock its all evil to her.
I cannot take this anymore so I get up looking for my gloves, shoes ,and the coat my father left me.
I sneak out through my roof jumping stealthly between each roof down to Tims house. The cool air between each jump feels sweet against my face and the loneliness isnt so bad anymore. I reach Tims window and pry it open with the tip of my fingers and slide into his room. Tim being the little perv he is sits at his computer looking at pictures of half naked women oblivious to the fact I just got in.
I sneak up behind him and whisper into his ear "buddy your gonna go blind looking at pictures like those." He turns and looks square into my eyes grabbing me into a bear hug and yelling "Nathan i told you not to do that you b*****d!!" I gasp for breath hes never trully understood down but with a quickness only a guy as big as Tim could have he dops me down talking in the half mumble people know him for. "Hey Nathan hows you girlfriend ummm Kristina"...He goes into a jumble of words I half hear out of the the sleepiness.
I awake sleeply in a dark room lit by one single gothic style torch. I finally awake fully to notice that im hanging from my arms next to a man who screams "Hell is a real place and the Devils entertainment is those who've fallen from Gods embrace!!" I try to get his attention but he slowly turns to me and i notice his eyes are stitched shut and his tounge is ripped out.
I turn an vomit on a skeleton laying on the floor. I get up and look at the man next to me. He screams "It comes back for fresh blood RUN!!! You arent dead you are the desider the one who can heal the aching world above ,or destroy it using Hells true face the River of Flames!!"............ He is shut out by the cackiling of a giant red demon who covers his mouth with a with a giant bear like hand. The demon turns to me telling me "You have a big decision to make....lets hope this one is the right one boy."
This is the start of Nathaniels journey Ill enter chapters 2 and 3 if this one does well
- Title: The End All War
- Artist: ChewZilla
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Description:
Its an interseting concept mostly the end war between heaven and hell with humans stuck in between. This is the start with Nathaniel who does take a trip to both Heaven and Hell one to meet with the devil himself and the other to speak to the messenger of God.
This is just chapter one hope you like it. - Date: 07/16/2008
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Comments (2 Comments)
- Dragon legs - 07/16/2008
- Septus is right, pretty good though, i want the rest
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- xSEPTUSx - 07/16/2008
- I like it, but there are a lot of grammatical errors and such. For instance when you're talking about your parents and you use "mother" or "father" as their name and M and F need to be capitalized, but not every time you mention the words. Also, you don't use much punctuation. (commas, apostrophes, semi-colons, quotation marks, etc) Just a little bit of editing and it'd be on the right path. Also, when someone says something, you're supposed to start a new paragraph.
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